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Sunday, December 28, 2008

The demise of Ranger Bob

The snow gates are what blocks the road over Sonora Pass during the winter months. The road is too steep, narrow and winding to plow, so after the first snow they just close the road.
Me and Dave were always waiting for Ranger Bob to open the gates so we could be the first ones over the pass.

We had heard that the snow gates at Kennedy Meadows were supposed to be unlocked at 8:00 a.m. on Mother's Day, 1987. I knew Mom wouldn't understand, so I lied and said I had to work that day.
Anyways, we were there at 8:00 sharp. We was the only ones there, too. Ranger Bob was nowhere to be seen. By 8:30, we were making plans to shoot Ranger Bob. By 8:45, those plans began to include his close family members. At 9:00, we decided to blow up the ranger station too. At 9:05, I said "To hell with it, I'll open those fucking gates my own self." I hauled out my Ruger 41 and headed for the gates.
"Wait a few more minutes," Dave said, grabbing my arm. He no sooner says that, and Ranger Bob's pickup rounds the bend. Talk about a close call.

May of 88 found us up at the snow gates above Kennedy Meadows once again planning Ranger Bob's demise when he finally decides to show up. Climbing out of his Rangermobile with the keys to the gates, he asks, "Don't I know you guys from somewhere?"

It was April of 1989, and we were at the snow gates at Kennedy Meadows, staring at them in amazement. They weren't supposed to open until 8:00, but they were already open and it wasn't even 7:15 yet.
We agreed that somebody less tolerant than ourselves had finally had enough of Ranger Bob's tardiness and killed his worthless ass. His replacement was a more conscientious fellow judging by the fact that the gate was open at least 2 hours earlier than Ranger Bob would have opened it.

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