A man with a black eye, boards a plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down. He immediately notices that the man next to him also has a black eye and says, "Hey this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?"
The other guy replies, "Well, it was a tongue twister accident. I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most beautiful large breasts was there. So, instead of saying 'I'd like two tickets to Pittsburgh,' I accidentally said, 'I'd like two pickets to Tittsburgh.'... and she socked me a good one."
The first guy replied, "Wow! This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue twister too. I was at the breakfast table and I wanted to say to my wife, 'Please pour me a cup of coffee honey.' But I accidentally said, 'You've ruined my life you evil, self-centered bitch."