Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Book Report



Students at a local school were assigned to read 2 books, 'Titanic' and 'My Life' by Bill Clinton.
One student turned in the following book report with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!
His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.


Titanic:..... Cost - $29.99
Clinton:..... Cost - $29.99


Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read.
Clinton:... Over 3 hours to read.


Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton:... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.


Titanic:.... Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton:..... Bill is a bullshit artist.


Titanic:.... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton:.... Ditto for Bill.


Titanic:..... During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton:..... Ditto for Monica.


Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton:... Let's not go there.


Titanic:.... Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton:..... Monica' s forced to return her gifts.


Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton:..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.


Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton:..... Monica.. ooh, let's not go there, either.


Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton:...... Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing.

Thanks, Woody.