Sunday, April 05, 2009
Either that or kill him
Bert took his Saint Bernard to the vet. "Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail."
The vet, shocked at such an unusual request, asked "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?"
"Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."
The vet, shocked at such an unusual request, asked "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?"
"Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."
Oh, c'mon. It's funny. Kinda sorta...
How do we know two wrongs don't make a right?
Black couples don't have white children.
Black couples don't have white children.
Saturday, April 04, 2009
Shooting With My Dad
I went up to the hills today with my Dad to do a little shooting and had a GREAT time. We shot the 22 pistols, drank some coffee and bullshitted for a while, then got some 41 time in. These pictures are of him shooting my Ruger Blackhawk chambered in 41 magnum. The loads were 285 grain hardcast bullets over 20 grains of H110 and a large pistol primer, for a velocity of 1400 feet per second. Yeah, that load thumps a bit as you can see by the bottom picture of him in full recoil.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Big Brown Delivers
Clean enough for ya, Deb? No mess in the background, no grass stains on the elbows, and clean drawers. Don't get no better than this.....
Sarcasm at it's best
Dear President Obama,
Thank you for helping my neighbors with their mortgage payments. You know the one's down the street who in the good times refinanced their house several times and bought SUV's, ATV's, RV"s, a pool, a big screen, two Wave Runners and a Harley. But I was wondering, since I am paying my mortgage and theirs, could you arrange for me to borrow the Harley now and then?
Richard Ford Queen Creek AZ
P.S. They also need help with their credit cards, when do you want me to start making those payments?
P.P.S. I almost forgot - they didn't file their income tax return this year. Should I go ahead and file for them or will you be appointing them to cabinet posts?
From Yolo (who else?)
Thank you for helping my neighbors with their mortgage payments. You know the one's down the street who in the good times refinanced their house several times and bought SUV's, ATV's, RV"s, a pool, a big screen, two Wave Runners and a Harley. But I was wondering, since I am paying my mortgage and theirs, could you arrange for me to borrow the Harley now and then?
Richard Ford Queen Creek AZ
P.S. They also need help with their credit cards, when do you want me to start making those payments?
P.P.S. I almost forgot - they didn't file their income tax return this year. Should I go ahead and file for them or will you be appointing them to cabinet posts?
From Yolo (who else?)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Good News/Bad News
"I've got some good news and some bad news" the doctor says.
"What's the bad news?" asks the patient.
"The bad news is that unfortunately you've only got 3 months to live".
The patient is taken aback, "What's the good news then, Doctor?"
The doctor points over to the secretary at the front desk, "You see that blonde with the big breasts, tight ass and legs that go all the way up to heaven?"
The patient nods his head.
The doctor replies, "I'm fucking her."
Not bad, Yolo. Not bad at all.
"What's the bad news?" asks the patient.
"The bad news is that unfortunately you've only got 3 months to live".
The patient is taken aback, "What's the good news then, Doctor?"
The doctor points over to the secretary at the front desk, "You see that blonde with the big breasts, tight ass and legs that go all the way up to heaven?"
The patient nods his head.
The doctor replies, "I'm fucking her."
Not bad, Yolo. Not bad at all.
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