Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Well, somebody's happy
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, the wars, lost jobs, Savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc.......
I called Lifeline. Got a freakin' Call Center in Pakistan . I told them I was suicidal. They all got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
I called Lifeline. Got a freakin' Call Center in Pakistan . I told them I was suicidal. They all got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
Yeah, why?
Why is it that if you cross the North Korean border illegally you get thrown into prison and get 12 years of hard labor... if you cross the Iranian border while out supposedly leisurely hiking in the hills you get arrested and imprisoned... but if you cross the U.S. border illegally, you get a drivers license, a Social Security card and free health care?
-Bud
-Bud
FUCK YOU, ARNOLD!!!!
"To the Members of the California State Assembly: I am signing Assembly Bill 962.
This measure would require vendors of handgun ammunition to keep a log of information on handgun ammunition sales, store ammunition in a safe and secure manner, and require the face to-face transfer of ammunition sales.
Although I have previously vetoed legislation similar to this measure, local governments have demonstrated that requiring ammunition vendors to keep records on ammunition sales improves public safety. These records have allowed law enforcement to arrest and prosecute persons who have no business possessing firearms and ammunition: gang members, violent parolees, second and third strikers, and even people previously serving time in state prison for murder.
Utilized properly, this type of information is invaluable for keeping communities safe and preventing dangerous felons from committing crimes with firearms.
Moreover, this type of record keeping is no more intrusive for law abiding citizens than similar laws governing pawnshops or the sale of cold medicine. Unfortunately, even the most successfullocal program is flawed; without a statewide law, felons can easily skirt the record keeping requirements of one city by visiting another. Assembly Bill 962 will fix this problem bymandating that all ammunition vendors in the state keep records on ammunition sales.
As Governor, I have sought the appropriate balance between public safety and the right to keep and bear arms. I have signed important public safety measures to regulate the sale and transfer of .50 caliber rifles, instituted the California Firearms License Check program, and promoted the use of microstamping technology in handguns. I have also vetoed many pieces of legislation that sought to place unreasonable restrictions and burdens on firearms dealers and ammunition vendors.
Assembly Bill 962 reasonably regulates access to ammunition and improves public safety without placing undue burdens on consumers. For these reasons, I am pleased to sign this bill."
This measure would require vendors of handgun ammunition to keep a log of information on handgun ammunition sales, store ammunition in a safe and secure manner, and require the face to-face transfer of ammunition sales.
Although I have previously vetoed legislation similar to this measure, local governments have demonstrated that requiring ammunition vendors to keep records on ammunition sales improves public safety. These records have allowed law enforcement to arrest and prosecute persons who have no business possessing firearms and ammunition: gang members, violent parolees, second and third strikers, and even people previously serving time in state prison for murder.
Utilized properly, this type of information is invaluable for keeping communities safe and preventing dangerous felons from committing crimes with firearms.
Moreover, this type of record keeping is no more intrusive for law abiding citizens than similar laws governing pawnshops or the sale of cold medicine. Unfortunately, even the most successfullocal program is flawed; without a statewide law, felons can easily skirt the record keeping requirements of one city by visiting another. Assembly Bill 962 will fix this problem bymandating that all ammunition vendors in the state keep records on ammunition sales.
As Governor, I have sought the appropriate balance between public safety and the right to keep and bear arms. I have signed important public safety measures to regulate the sale and transfer of .50 caliber rifles, instituted the California Firearms License Check program, and promoted the use of microstamping technology in handguns. I have also vetoed many pieces of legislation that sought to place unreasonable restrictions and burdens on firearms dealers and ammunition vendors.
Assembly Bill 962 reasonably regulates access to ammunition and improves public safety without placing undue burdens on consumers. For these reasons, I am pleased to sign this bill."
Always misunderstood
The lesbians next door asked me what I would like for my birthday. I was quite surprised when they gave me a Rolex.
It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch."
It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch."
-Yolo
.bmp)
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
No rats in MY trailer park!
A year or so ago me and Brother Jerome were harassing each other, making comparisons on White Trash and 'Hood Rats, laughing about how much we were alike.
He brought up the fact that his people were crackheads, mine were tweekers, both of us had family that made a career out of welfare, how both of our people couldn't take a walk around the block unarmed, mismatched tires on our cars, how you could tell when it was the 15th or 1st of the month by all the folks sitting in lawn chairs next to the mailbox waiting for their government checks, etc, etc.
I had to stop him though, when he said something about us both having rats.
"Naw man, we ain't got no rats in the trailer park" I said.
"What you sayin', you got no rats in the trailer park?" he asked. "You're lyin' to me. I know y'all got rats, man."
"I'm tellin' you Bro, we don't have rats. But you oughta see the size of our motherfucking mice. They're damned near a foot long!"
Book Report
Students at a local school were assigned to read 2 books, 'Titanic' and 'My Life' by Bill Clinton.
One student turned in the following book report with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!
His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.
Titanic:..... Cost - $29.99
Clinton:..... Cost - $29.99
Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read.
Clinton:... Over 3 hours to read.
Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton:... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Titanic:.... Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton:..... Bill is a bullshit artist.
Titanic:.... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton:.... Ditto for Bill.
Titanic:..... During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton:..... Ditto for Monica.
Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton:... Let's not go there.
Titanic:.... Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton:..... Monica' s forced to return her gifts.
Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton:..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.
Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton:..... Monica.. ooh, let's not go there, either.
Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton:...... Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing.
Thanks, Woody.
I thought all the freaks were in California
Looking for a Girlfriend - Watch more Funny Videos
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Blame Yolo for this one
Reloading 101
Top of the Chain is running a series of articles on reloading, and up to part 2 so far. It's a good read for those of you that haven't taken the plunge yet. Check it out.
http://topofthechain.blogspot.com
http://topofthechain.blogspot.com
Monday, October 19, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
She got what she deserved
RUTLAND — A man placed on probation last week for allegedly assaulting his wife was arraigned yesterday on new charges stemming from an alleged assault his spouse said was brought on by her failure to properly cook his bacon on Sunday.
John L. Rutledge, 50, of 14 Patriot Lane, has been attending a program for “batterers” on a charge of slapping his wife and was ordered last week to complete the program. He was placed on probation. The arraignment took place in Western Worcester District Court, East Brookfield.
His wife had successfully asked the judge to keep in place a restraining order that forbade him from abusing her. But on Sunday morning, she called police and told them her husband had struck her in the back of the head. She had been turning over strips of bacon that were cooking in a pan when Mr. Rutledge became angry because “it wasn’t in a neat line,” she wrote in a statement she gave police. She told police he struck her and told her, “You’re going to cause your own death.” He allegedly pushed her onto the couch when she threatened to call 911, saying, “You’ll pay with your life.”
Mr. Rutledge allegedly told police his wife had threatened to throw hot bacon grease on him.
According to court documents, the former U.S. Marine told officers he had no guns in the house, but his wife and police found a .223-caliber assault rifle in the basement and ammunition and two unloaded handguns equipped with trigger locks in a safe in his closet. He was supposed to have handed over all weapons when the first restraining order was put in place.
The couple’s son was at home and told police he did not see or hear the altercation.
Mr. Rutledge was arrested and charged with assault and battery, violation of a firearms surrender order and violation of an abuse prevention order. He was held without right to bail at his arraignment yesterday and is due back in court for a dangerousness hearing and a probation violation hearing tomorrow.
Thanks, Tattoo Jim. Maybe women everywhere will read this and learn from it.
John L. Rutledge, 50, of 14 Patriot Lane, has been attending a program for “batterers” on a charge of slapping his wife and was ordered last week to complete the program. He was placed on probation. The arraignment took place in Western Worcester District Court, East Brookfield.
His wife had successfully asked the judge to keep in place a restraining order that forbade him from abusing her. But on Sunday morning, she called police and told them her husband had struck her in the back of the head. She had been turning over strips of bacon that were cooking in a pan when Mr. Rutledge became angry because “it wasn’t in a neat line,” she wrote in a statement she gave police. She told police he struck her and told her, “You’re going to cause your own death.” He allegedly pushed her onto the couch when she threatened to call 911, saying, “You’ll pay with your life.”
Mr. Rutledge allegedly told police his wife had threatened to throw hot bacon grease on him.
According to court documents, the former U.S. Marine told officers he had no guns in the house, but his wife and police found a .223-caliber assault rifle in the basement and ammunition and two unloaded handguns equipped with trigger locks in a safe in his closet. He was supposed to have handed over all weapons when the first restraining order was put in place.
The couple’s son was at home and told police he did not see or hear the altercation.
Mr. Rutledge was arrested and charged with assault and battery, violation of a firearms surrender order and violation of an abuse prevention order. He was held without right to bail at his arraignment yesterday and is due back in court for a dangerousness hearing and a probation violation hearing tomorrow.
Thanks, Tattoo Jim. Maybe women everywhere will read this and learn from it.
For all the golfers out there
I hope you don't mind a quick tip, but I thought you might appreciate this article I just posted on my blog. It's a tongue-in-cheek safety guide for golfers, complete with tales of death and foolproof advice for avoiding it. Here's the link:
http://www.zipgolfer.com/defy-golf-death/
If you do check it out, thanks! I really appreciate that.
Regards,
Ken
Funny shit, Ken. Thanks for passing it along.
-Ken
http://www.zipgolfer.com/defy-golf-death/
If you do check it out, thanks! I really appreciate that.
Regards,
Ken
Funny shit, Ken. Thanks for passing it along.
-Ken
Yeah, that's one way to put it.
The following is the 2007 winning entry from an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year's term was "Political Correctness"
The winner wrote:
"Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."
-Tattoo Jim
The winner wrote:
"Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."
-Tattoo Jim
That's it. We're truly fucked now.
Please, follow the links, spread the word.
http://cbullitt.wordpress.com/2009/10/16/monckton-obama-to-cede-u-s-sovreignty-via-agw-treaty/
-cbullitt
http://cbullitt.wordpress.com/2009/10/16/monckton-obama-to-cede-u-s-sovreignty-via-agw-treaty/
-cbullitt
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Ain't that the fucking truth......
I know you get lots of stuff sent your way but this really should be the main talking points for Conservatives.
http://blog.jamesjayjordan.com/2009/10/14/conservative-v-liberal/
Woody
If a conservative does not like guns, he does not buy one. If a liberal does not like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he does not eat meat. If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy. A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.
If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life. If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.
If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful. Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.
If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation. A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels. Liberals demand that those they don’t like be shut down.
If a conservative is a non-believer, he does not go to church. A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)
If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.
If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed. If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he’s in labor and then sues.
If a conservative reads this, he’ll link to it so his friends can have a good laugh. A liberal will type in the url for the ACLU because he’s “offended”.
-j-
http://blog.jamesjayjordan.com/2009/10/14/conservative-v-liberal/
Woody
If a conservative does not like guns, he does not buy one. If a liberal does not like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he does not eat meat. If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy. A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.
If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life. If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.
If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful. Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.
If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation. A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels. Liberals demand that those they don’t like be shut down.
If a conservative is a non-believer, he does not go to church. A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)
If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.
If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed. If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he’s in labor and then sues.
If a conservative reads this, he’ll link to it so his friends can have a good laugh. A liberal will type in the url for the ACLU because he’s “offended”.
-j-
It's all about me
I'm fucking tired. I loaded trucks all goddamned day, 18 of them motherfuckers, and not in much of a mood to post.
Let me get a couple of beers down and see how I feel after that.
Fuck Obama.
Let me get a couple of beers down and see how I feel after that.
Fuck Obama.
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