I DID NOT kill bin laden on my vacation

Y'all may have noticed that I didn't post anything about bin laden. There was no need to, the news spread like wildfire.
I was walking CGD around the block so he could visit his neighborhood kids when cheers erupted from the house we were in front of. I thought there was a football/baseball/basketball (I don't follow sports) game on and didn't think much about it when the lady of the house came out and asked how long I'd been walking The Beast. I said "I dunno, a half hour mebbe?" and she gave me the news, said the bin laden had been killed by a bomb 4 days ago and they just released it after confirming his DNA.
I went home and that was the same story I got online.
Today I get the paper and hear that he was killed yesterday by a SEAL Team with a head shot through his eye.
Good going, Guys. I love you. The entire country loves you.

And no, I didn't have anything to do with it regardless of a couple of cool comments I got today.

You can lie all you want about where you are, we all know you were in Pakistan and provided the head shot...   Coyote hunting my ass... you been hunting bigger game is my guess... if the truth ever comes out, I'm betting it was you who popped Bin Ladin, Kenny!!! And I'm also betting there was a piece of bacon fat shoved in his mouth and a sausage link shoved up his ass... Way to go Wirecutter!!! Way to go!!!!   I doubledamn guarantee you that if I was there I would've hauled his ass out smeared in pig shit.   What pisses me the fuck off about the whole situation is the fact they gave him an islamic burial, albeit at sea. They should've packed that bitch in ice, brought him back to the US and displayed his fucking corpse at Ground Zero until the flesh was falling off his bones, then fed him to the fucking pigs and then butchered them. I would've bought some of that bacon. But that's just my opinion.   But speaking of burying him at sea, Woody was laughing at something he heard on Mark Levine: Burying him at sea denies him his 72 virgins. Now he gets 72 sturgeons......