Hello-lo-lo-lo-lo......

You know there's gotta be an echo up in that motherfucker.

Oswald Bastable's New Zealand pig

And cooked over a fire of wood from a rare and rapidly disappearing tree, he adds.

*****

Fucking A, man. Hippies suck.

I'm thinking this ain't his first trip to the joint

It's only gonna get worse

- David

Classifications

Can you help a brotha out?

- Derek

Coming soon to a government near you!

WHILE many believed it to be an April Fool's Day joke, Vladimir Putin has confirmed Russia has been testing mind-bending psychotronic guns that can effectively turn people into zombies.
The futuristic weapons - which attack their victims' central nervous system - are being developed by scientists and could be used against Russia's enemies and even its own dissidents by the end of the decade.
Mr Putin has described the guns, which use electromagnetic radiation like that found in microwave ovens, as entirely new instruments for achieving political and strategic goals.
Plans to introduce the super-weapons were announced by Russian defence minister Anatoly Serdyukov.
While the technology has been around for some time, MrTsyganok said the guns were recently tested for crowd control purposes.
“When it was used for dispersing a crowd and it was focused on a man, his body temperature went up immediately as if he was thrown into a hot frying pan," Mr Tsyganok said.

"Still, we know very little about this weapon and even special forces guys can hardly cope with it,'' he said.
Research into electromagnetic weapons has been carried out in the US and Russia since the '50s but it appears Putin has stolen a march on the US.
Precise details have not been revealed but previous research has shown that low-frequency waves or beams can affect brain cells, alter psychological states and make it possible to transmit suggestions and commands directly into someone's thoughts.
MORE HERE

Bacon. Mmmmm, bacon.....

A whole shirtful of titties

Great. I pissed somebody else off.

Back in January I did a post called The Big Bad Wolf where I showed some monstrous fucking wolves that were legally taken in either Idaho or Canada depending on who you're talking to.
Since then my hate mail has increased an impressive amount, thank you very much, especially after the 28th of February.
No big deal. I got other shit to worry about.
Then tonight I went to my blogger stats page and pulled this page up:

Click to enlarge or get off your lazy ass and get your glasses

Those are my monthly stats to date from March 6 to April 4.

No shit, there's 851 page views for The Big Bad Wolf, coming in behind 3 Camel Toes and a Tittie shot (big surprise there) and ol' T-Rocks' Facebook Photo.

Fucking Animal Rights assholes and PETAphiles are abusing my post, man.

You can go HERE and read the last few comments for a short version of what I've been catching.

I gotta admit, this one caught me by surprise. Of all the different individuals and groups I fuck with (I even make fun of retards, for gods' sake) I never even considered PETA or Love The Wolf or whatever little splinter group is making me their target of the moment.

Yeah, so if anybody's got any pictures of dead animals they took and would like to see posted, send 'em on in. A little background info like where it was taken, weight, all the usual bragging shit would be appreciated.

Keep on "winning" - I need the entertainment.

“We won! We won! They pepper-sprayed us!”: Proof that the purpose of protests is to provoke a police response

Doesn’t matter what the protest is about. Doesn’t matter who is protesting or what they’re protesting against. All that matters, in modern political activism, is that you provoke a reaction from the police, which you can then spin as an over-reaction, and claim moral victory.
The goal of protests now is to achieve victimhood. Thus, when police arrest, tear-gas, beat, or otherwise try to control an unruly mob, the protesters are ecstatically happy, because that’s why they were protesting in the first place.
But of course you can’t admit this publicly; part of the script is to act injured or sad or angry when the police respond to your provocations. That’s an essential component of your victimhood posturing.
Unfortunately, yesterday a protester at Santa Monica College let the mask slip during a mini-riot at a trustees’ meeting. Over a hundred screaming demonstrators were trying to force their way into the already over-capacity meeting room, and the overwhelmed cops assigned to guard the door felt the only way to drive the rioters back was to pepper-spray them. As soon as this happened, one of the rioters yelled in glee,

“We won! We won! They pepper-sprayed us!”

Here’s the video, with the triumphant statement at 1:09:




Wait — you won? How does getting pepper-sprayed constitute victory? I thought the goal of your protest was to force the trustees to give you a “free education,” as the protesters were chanting? That didn’t happen (tuition fees were not eliminated by the college’s trustees), so wouldn’t that mean that you lost?
Well, the statement wouldn’t make any sense unless the purpose of the protest was in fact to get pepper-sprayed. Which it was.
As is the case in most of these incidents, once you actually see the circumstances, your sympathy almost always switches over to the police, who in this case were totally outnumbered by a violent and unruly mob attempting to bum-rush and overwhelm a legal meeting.
We have seen this countless times in recent years, as protesters of every sort from coast to coast go to extreme lengths to provoke the police into (over)reactions, because declaring victimhood is the only way to garner sympathy for your otherwise obscure cause. The Occupy movement, for example, strives to achieve victimhood at every possible opportunity, as does basically every other group that follows Alinsky rules.
What makes this doubly absurd is that pepper-spray was designed specifically as a non-lethal, non-injurious crowd dispersal technique about which there would be no basis to complain, since it now substitutes for harsher methods that were previously used for centuries — such as savage beating, live ammunition, police dogs, etc. But now even the mildest, shortest-lasting crowd-control techniques are portrayed by the media as unbearable torture. (And I’ve been pepper-sprayed several times in my life, including most recently during riots at the 2008 Democratic convention, and can say from personal experience that 1. It stings and hurts, 2. It makes you cry and run away, and 3. Then it wears off fairly quickly and you’re back to normal, uninjured.)
The more that the general public becomes aware of the purpose of aggressive protesting, the less that the victimhood posturing game will have any effect on public opinion. Spread the word.
PJ MEDIA

CAMEL TOE!!!!!

-Irish

How hunting turned me into an OWSer

A conversation with another blogger who shall remain nameless this morning about his poor gardening skills got me to thinking about my own shortcomings concerning my own skillset when it comes to meat hunting.
Now I do hunt coyotes and I'm fairly good at it, but there's a big difference between hunting a predator and hunting meat. Hunting deer for the most part is a waiting game and requires lots and lots of patience. When I coyote hunt, I spent 30 minutes tops on each stand before packing it in and moving 3-4 miles to a fresh stand. Not a lot of boredom there.

*****

I hunted deer (because that's what men do) for 25 years without actually killing one. I'd miss the shot, have an unloaded rifle, break a twig, something, SOMETHING would happen every time causing me to not get a deer that season.
I was a disgrace to the Lane Clan. Relatives would bring me some of their meat to share, feeling sorry for me. Pretty soon I got used to it and realized that I was eating better than I was if I was doing the actual hunting, skinning and processing and not only that but I was getting a much greater variety of wild game. I was getting waterfowl, upland birds, pig, venison, buffalo and lots of other exotic shit too. Hell, even if I wanted to I didn't have time or money to hunt all those other things. It was much easier to let all my relations (who I don't care for anyways) go out and spend their time and money freezing or sweating their asses off while I kicked back in my Camouflaged Bass Pro Easy Chair.
Besides, it made them feel better about themselves as well as feeling better than me to bring me meat. It gave them a chance to re-live the experience of freezing half to death and the incredible 53 yard shot that they managed to take despite overwhelming odds in order to bring me my free food that they were obligated to bring to me because they had so much that it would go bad otherwise.
Damn, with all that free food I was pretty much able to eliminate meat from my budget allowing me to spend more on myself - ammo, hunting gear, books, you know - stuff that I deserved because that's who I am. I gotta be me, ya hear what I'm sayin'?

I don't know what I'm going to do when all those idiots realize that they're being taken advantage of. Maybe camp out on their front lawns demanding my meat, maybe shit on their cars. Protests, picketing, something. I can't be expected to fend for myself, I got my own shit to do.

Straight-up White Trash - God bless him/her/it

-Irish

Memories.....

Oh, fuck you too.

“Every time I travel around the country, somebody is going around saying, we’re praying for you,” he said. “It especially means a lot to us when we hear from folks who we know probably didn’t vote for me and yet, expressing extraordinary sincerity about their prayers.”
- Obama
www.weaselzippers.us

*****

And every day I pray that a drunken illegal alien that is getting a blow job from Cindy Sheehan is driving a car that crashes through your motorcade, hits your limo and you're refused treatment because the admin at the private hospital that you're taken to doesn't treat folks that can't prove their citizenship.
But that's just my private prayers.....

Paybacks

(Reuters) - The Obama administration on Tuesday said it was preparing to sue Arizona county sheriff Joe Arpaio and his department for violating civil rights laws by improperly targeting Latinos in a bid to crack down on illegal immigrants.
The sheriff's high-profile crackdown on illegal immigrants has helped thrust the issue onto the national political stage with some states passing tough new laws aimed at pushing out those in the country illegally.
The administration's Justice Department and the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office have been in settlement talks for months over allegations that officers regularly made unlawful stops and arrests of Latinos, used excessive force against them and failed to adequately protect the Hispanic community.
SOURCE

*****

Of course everybody knows that we don't have a problem with hispanic illegals, it's those crafty blue eyed and blonde headed Swedes that are sneaking in through Canada that are giving us fits.
Stupid, stupid Sheriff Joe.....

Awwwww.....

Supreme Irony

Her EARRINGS cover more than her clothes do! YES!!!

Hey Primo, come on up, man.

DHS granting 'Unlawful Presence Waivers'.

No shit. Really. I am not kidding.

In its quest to implement stealth amnesty, the Obama Administration is working behind the scenes to halt the deportation of certain illegal immigrants by granting them “unlawful presence waivers.”

The new measure would apply to illegal aliens who are relatives of American citizens. Here is how it would work, according to a Department of Homeland Security (DHS) announcement posted in today’s Federal Register, the daily journal of the U.S. government; the agency will grant “unlawful presence waivers” to illegal aliens who can prove they have a relative that’s a U.S. citizen.

Currently such aliens must return to their native country and request a waiver of inadmissibility in an existing overseas immigrant visa process. In other words, they must enter the U.S. legally as thousands of foreigners do on a yearly basis. Besides the obvious security issues, changing this would be like rewarding bad behavior in a child. It doesn’t make sense.

But the system often causes U.S. citizens to be separated for extended periods from their immediate relatives,” according to the DHS. The proposed changes, first announced in January, will significantly reduce the length of time U.S. citizens are separated from their loved ones while required to remain outside the United States during the current visa processing system.

The administration also claims that relaxing the rule will also “create efficiencies for both the U.S. government and most applicants.” How exactly is not listed in the Federal Register announcement, which gives the public 60 days to comment. That’s only a formality since the DHS has indicated that the change is pretty much a done deal.

This appears to be part of the Obama Administration’s bigger plan to blow off Congress by using its executive powers to grant illegal immigrants backdoor amnesty. The plan has been in the works for years and in 2010 Texas’s largest newspaper published an exposé about a then-secret DHS initiative that systematically cancelled pending deportations. The remarkable program stunned the legal profession and baffled immigration attorneys who said the government bounced their clients’ deportation even when expulsion was virtually guaranteed.

In late 2011 a mainstream newspaper obtained internal Homeland Security documents outlining “sweeping changes” in immigration enforcement that halt the deportation of illegal aliens with no criminal records. This also includes a nationwide “training program” to assure that enforcement agents and prosecuting attorneys don’t remove illegal immigrants who haven’t been convicted of crimes.

Judicial Watch has been a front runner in investigating the Obama Administration’s stealth amnesty program by pursuing DHS records concerning “deferred action” or “parole” to suspend removal proceedings against a particular group of individuals. Last spring JW sued DHS to obtain information because the agency ignored a federal public records request that dates back to July 2010.

SOURCE

Thanks to Murray for the tip and link.

A ThreePer on a beer run?

FUCK YEAH!!!!!

-Dave

CAMEL TOE!!!!!

Look quick. It's right at the 11 second mark.

Awwwww..... I think.

Go on, take one for the team!

Under the gun

FARMINGTON, N.M. (AP) — A contest that involved killing more than a dozen coyotes in Farmington is drawing ire from a state wildlife protection group for its “bloodthirstiness.”
The Farmington chapter of Sportsmen for Fish and Wildlife held a so-called coyote-calling contest last weekend, attracting 22 hunters who killed 16 coyotes in two days. It was the seventh year for the event.
Hunters use specialized reeds to mimic the sounds of a dying animal, such as a rabbit, to attract the coyotes to kill them.
The Farmington Daily-Times reports (http://bit.ly/H4JXop ) that such events aren't too common in New Mexico, but Sportsmen member Frances Espinoza said hunting predators is a fast-growing hobby across the country.
Proponents of the practice say that coyotes damage deer herds and kill livestock and sometimes people's pets, while critics say it amounts to animal cruelty.
“While these events aren't illegal, they are astonishingly egregious for their bloodthirstiness,” said Phil Carter, wildlife campaign manager for Animal Protection of New Mexico.
He said anyone who supports the “repulsive killings contests” is displaying a callous disregard for wildlife.
Espinoza, a game commissioner from Farmington and a former executive director and Sportsmen's former director, said hunting coyotes is a method of managing the predators' population.
“You have fishing contests. Is that cruel?” he said. “It is a method of management and recreation just like any other hunting activity.”
Darwin Gunnick, a Sportsmen member, said the hunts are necessary.
“We need to control coyotes if we want to keep the other animals,” he said. “And hunters are the only ones that will do it.”
John Hansen, a wildlife biologist for the Bureau of Land Management's Farmington office, said coyotes live all over San Juan County, including in Farmington city limits by the rivers or in open fields of sagebrush and pinon and juniper trees.
They eat small animals like rabbits and mice, but also animals as large as sheep, baby deer and cattle, and people's pets.
Hansen said that while the BLM focuses on habitat preservation to help sustain local wildlife, there is evidence that shows killing coyotes can prove beneficial to deer and livestock populations.
“Coyotes are in Farmington, they're at the river bottoms and they kill a lot of cats and small dogs,” Gunnick said. “A lot of people have problems with them.”
Predator Xtreme

*****

Back in November 2010 Stevie Foodstamps sent me a link about a coyote derby in Grady NM that was being held to raise funds for the local High Schools' girl's sports program. This had been going on for quite a while but when a new resident from Des Moines Iowa moved in (to enjoy rural life, no doubt) he was outraged and went squalling to the media about it.
He raised so much shit about it that the PETAphiles got involved - luckily a Texas resident that had attended Grady High took over the sponsorship of the contest to relieve the pressure off the school. You can find my original posts and snide opinions HERE and HERE and HERE.
I'm pretty sure the whiner moved.

Fucking people that move out to the country need to realize that shit goes on in the country that they didn't even think about. It's not all about meadows in the springtime, peaceful and quiet with Bambi and Thumper frolicking in the meadow.
There's 24 hour farming with the noise and the smells - they do tractor work at night around here. You try sitting in the cab of a tractor or combine when it's 110 degrees out. Even with the AC it's like sitting in a greenhouse.
Then there's the god-awful stink of dairies, hog farms and poultry ranches and everything that goes with them and we won't even mention the swarms of flies carrying all that nasty manure on their little footses.
And what about the tallow plants that are needed to dispose of the hundreds of dead cattle every day? You ever smell a tallow plant when it's running full bore in the dead of summer? Think paper mills here and multiply that by 10 with an added gag factor thrown in for good measure.
And yes, animals are killed in rural areas. Animals are slaughtered both for personal use and business. Fact of life.
And from August all the way through spring, something is in season be it dove, pheasant, turkey, duck, goose, deer, bear or whatever - you're going to hear gunfire continuously and if you're lucky enough to live in the west, coyote season is usually open all year round!
Shit dies. Get used to it.

It got so bad around here that a few years ago most of the counties here in the San Joaquin Valley had to pass resolutions declaring them "Right To Farm" counties. Motherfuckers were moving into the valley from San Fransicko to escape their high housing prices and subdivisions were spring up everywhere, some of them right next door to dairies and working farms. They must've bought their houses when the wind was right or something because right after they moved in they'd start complaining about noise and smells and their disturbed sleep and shit and then bring suit against the farmers, some of them that had been operating for 50-100 years.

OH DEAR GOD!!!!!

Using kids as campaign tools. Real Classy.

Until a couple of months ago Mooch-elle wouldn't be caught dead with a white child. As soon as the campaign gets serious, them pinkies are in every picture with her.
Fuck, now she's even trying to talk the kiddies into asking their mommies and daddies to vote for that communist piece of garbage.

The first lady tried to enlist “Families for Obama” at an event with tickets starting at $500 a pop at the California Academy of Sciences in San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park on Friday.
The pool reporter estimated that there were a couple dozen kids in the audience of about 350, and Michelle Obama spent much of her speech talking to them.
“I mean, I can’t tell you in the last election how many grandparents I ran into who said, I wasn’t going to vote for Barack Obama until my grandson talked to me, until my great-grandson talked to me, and talked about the future he wanted for this country,” she said.
“You can get out there with your parents. You guys can knock on doors. I had one young lady who brought me a petition — she’s already working. You can convince wrong people. Sometimes we don’t listen to ourselves, but we will listen to our children.”
- www.weaselzippers.us

Hard landing or what?

Butt-ugly house.....

..... But you can shoot a coyote anywhere on the property from any room in the house, plus there's convenient overhangs for your skinning gambrels with room there for some beams and tables for fleshing the hides out. Then there's that nice empty wall that you can tack the hides to.

Yeah, I can work with that.

Somebody somewhere will get a nut over this

Nice looking babes but worth rubbing one out over? Nah.......
Well, maybe the one in green.

Caption, Please?

Cell phones & the police

WASHINGTON — Law enforcement tracking of cellphones, once the province mainly of federal agents, has become a powerful and widely used surveillance tool for local police officials, with hundreds of departments, large and small, often using it aggressively with little or no court oversight, documents show.       
The practice has become big business for cellphone companies, too, with a handful of carriers marketing a catalog of “surveillance fees” to police departments to determine a suspect’s location, trace phone calls and texts or provide other services. Some departments log dozens of traces a month for both emergencies and routine investigations.

With cellphones ubiquitous, the police call phone tracing a valuable weapon in emergencies like child abductions and suicide calls and investigations in drug cases and murders. One police training manual describes cellphones as “the virtual biographer of our daily activities,” providing a hunting ground for learning contacts and travels.

    

Lots more HERE.

*****

And this is the reason why you need a throw-away cell for your truck if you don't want Big Sis up in your fucking business tracking your day-to-day travels.

Go down to your local Radio Shack (wearing your ball cap and sunglasses of course) and check out their pre-pay phone and plans. Seeing as you're only going to be using this phone for calls and text (use your smartphone for accessing the internet and shit like that), keep it simple and cheap. You can find a phone ranging anywhere from 97 cents to $299 but what the fuck, we're not talking status symbols here, we're talking about simple comms. Besides, all the expensive phones allow you to access the internet and email and as soon as you sign into anything that's connected to you, the phone number that you accessed if from is now officially yours in the eyes of the law. Buy a phone with talk and text only for 10 bucks.

When making your decision, check the brochures and find out which systems has the best network coverage for your area. AT&T has pretty good coverage for the entire nation as does Sprint and Verizon. Virgin and Boost Mobile, not so good but their rates are cheaper.

Check the brochures for rates, minutes and expiration dates. You can buy minutes for small amounts like $5 to $20, but those minutes will expire after 30 days. At about 25 bucks and above, you get 250 minutes and they don't expire for 90 days. Some plans offer minutes that don't expire for a year for $100. A good choice for somebody such as myself (I use less than 100 minutes a month on my contract phone) would be the $25 plan.
I should say now that if your minutes run out, you're not obligated to run right out and buy minutes to keep the number active. You can throw that motherfucker in a drawer for months and you'll still have the same number when you add minutes again.

Also consider how easy it is to refill or add minutes to your phone. At the Radio Shack, you can buy the minutes WITH CASH and the clerk can add them for you or you can buy them at a different location every time and add them yourself for security purposes.

Pick your phone and minute plan, inform the salesdude of your choice and head to the counter feeling all sneaky and covert and shit. When you get rang up, the clerk will activate it for you. He'll ask your name and phone number. Give him a fake name and for the phone number, be a smartass and tell him that you don't have a phone, that's why you're buying that one and then look at him like he's fucking stupid or something. Or make up a number.

Pay attention to this part: When it comes time to pay - and if you paid any attention at all to what I just told you it'll be less than a pair of twenties - PAY CASH. Remember, you're trying to keep Big Sis off your ass and out of your business. PAY FUCKING CASH. Never use you credit or debit card on anything to do with this phone. Ever. Always PAY CASH.

Okay. after you've PAID CASH, you'll find your phone number on the receipt. The first thing you're gonna want to do is call it from your contract phone to make sure it works. Do not do that. I will repeat: Do. Not. Do. That. Do not connect your new Secret Squirrel phone to yourself in any way.

So now you've got a phone that you can use while you're out and about while Big Sis thinks you're sitting on your ass at home watching Predator Quest.

Nothing here is illegal, risky or unusual. You see poor folks and homeless people with cell phones? That's how they got 'em.

Thugs and dope dealers have been doing this for years and years for conducting business on phones that can't be traced back to them. Remember years ago when you only had your connections' pager number and he'd call you back from a phone booth and then suddenly he gives you his phone number so you can call him direct? It wasn't because he developed a new level of trust for you, that's when he got a throwaway cell phone.

If you decide to use your phone for taking care of business, you can take the extra step of just buying a new phone and tossing your old one out when your minutes run out or expire instead of buying more. You'll get a new number and you'll have to pass that on to your contacts but if it's for something slightly illegal or underhanded (not that I would condone such a thing) you shouldn't have more than a couple of contacts anyway. Besides, they'll be doing the same thing to keep shit secure.

So there's your lesson for the day.

Remember, no form of communication is completely secure but nobody says you gotta make it easy on the bastards. Make 'em work for it, man.

UDATE: As always with an "instructional" like this, read the comments. Sometimes readers come up with ideas that I overlook or don't know about. For instance Kerodin mentioned synching your bluetooth to both phones accidentally. I don't own a bluetooth, refuse to own one and don't know shit about them.

CAMEL TOE!!!!!

Mesmerizing

It's getting close

All right, only a couple more hours til the Big Event and I'm a married man again.
I slept pretty good last night, got up at a decent hour this morning and got shit ready.
Things are actually looking pretty good except for the storm front that moved in a while ago.
Miss Lisa spent the day yesterday tightening up the house and when she got up she started in again. Then she got some of those Scentsy things that you put over a low heat and it stinks up the house with shit like Rose, Vanilla and other assorted stink-ums.
I fired up the smoker and took care of that shit real good. The wind shifted and started blowing the smoke right into the house so instead of Vanilla, the house smells like a patch of mesquite caught fire. Much better......

But yeah, I'm as nervous as an altar boy at a monastery. I'd rather face down a 12 gauge than stand in front of a bunch of people while trying to be nice.

This is good. Real good.

Here is another fact that I know in my heart: When people like you and me decide to act, we will bring more intensity, power, and determination to the fight than will they. They have numerical superiority, and they have Techy advantages, at first.

But they do not have Principles for which they will die...only for which they will send others to kill.
Read the entire article over here at Sam's blog.

*****

Principles for which they will die..... Man, I'm seriously beginning to wonder if that's even passed down from Father to Son anymore.
Every great once in a while I'll run into a young man that impresses me but they're far and few between anymore.

NAACP to Sharpton: Fuck off

SANFORD, Fla. - The Rev. Al Sharpton said Friday his National Action Network will “move to the next level” if George Zimmerman is not arrested in the shooting death of Trayvon Martin.
Sharpton called for an escalation in peaceful civil disobedience and economic sanctions, although he did not say what those sanctions might be.
Turner Clayton, the Seminole County chapter president of the NAACP, reacted immediately to Sharpton’s warning, saying, “We hope that the citizens of Sanford will govern themselves accordingly. We are not calling for any sanctions, against any business or anyone else. And, of course, what Rev. Sharpton does, that’s strictly the [National] Action Network. We can’t condone that part of the conversation, if that’s what he said.”
Clayton said he believes that the expected 3,000 people who will attend Saturday’s march and rally in Sanford will realize the difference between Sharpton’s message and the NAACP’s mission.
“I don’t think they can confuse that,” Clayton said. “It’s just that they will have to make a judgment as to whether they want to follow the mission of the NAACP or follow what the Rev. Sharpton said.”
www.weaselzippers.us

*****

Hey, back a few years ago when I was doing advocacy with the homeless and I had the opportunity to attend a couple of NAACP meetings, I was really impressed with the agenda of the local chapter. There was none of the race baiting or hatred that I expected, they discussed stuff that any neighborhood meeting would have - what to do about a rising crime rate in their communities, how to help fun church-run youth programs, grafitti abatement, stuff like that.
Now, this was the Modesto chapter - I can't speak for any of the other ones.

Gotta maintain a sense of humor, man.

All right. We're fucking done here. The house has been cleaned over and over, the yard has been cut, the lists have been checked and double checked, the guest bathroom is sealed off, I got about $100 worth of pig in the icebox to go in the smoker later tonight, we got salad for the token gay couple, and I had the presence of mind to stash quick reloads of various calibers around the house and put a razor's edge on my KA-BAR in case of trouble.
I'm ready to get married tomorrow.

I had to run into Modesto earlier today to return a book to the libarry and drop off my monthly check at the bank for my ex-wife (if I'm not late, I don't hear from her), plus a couple odds and ends.
I hate going into Modesto even though the town I live in is basically a suburb of it. As soon as I cross the river, the fucking idiots started coming out of the woodwork.
Just coming off the bridge, I got behind a car that was doing about 15 mph and swerving from one side of his lane to the other. He comes to a stop in the middle of the road, opens his door and blows bacon. Then he notices a hooker walking down the median as he's wiping the vomit from his mouth and calls her over. Still pukey and he's looking for a blowjob.

Then I'm turning the corner off J Street to get to the Wicked Witch of the West's bank, they's got the fucking road closed off for a street fair that DRAIL (Disabilty Resources and Independent Living) is putting on. I park a couple of blocks away and when I get back to the street I cross from the corner and when I get about halfway across I angle off towards the bank and the street fair.
"Hey, get back in the sidewalk" barks a cop that didn't look more than 16.
What the fuck? I look over at the crowd at the street fair standing in the middle of the street not 50 feet away. "Are you fucking kidding me, Junior?" I pointed over at the crowd. He started to say something, then looked sheepish and turned his back. That's when I saw he wasn't carrying a gun. Fuck, he wasn't even a cop! He was an Explorer Scout. He WAS 16!
Great. This one's getting badge heavy before he even goes to work at the cop shop.

I get out of the bank and start checking out the street fair which I have to admit was pretty goddamned entertaining. Remember that this was put on by a Disabilities advocacy organization? These guys do pretty good work in the community for a bunch of lefties- they advocate for disabled folks as far as services and housing, shit like that. Not only that but it's run by a bunch of cripples. So yeah, the street fair was pretty fun - couple of  blind motherfuckers wandering around aimlessly, people cripping into tables and shit, retards smearing ice cream all over their faces and bibs and a handful of people in the street with their helmets all askew trying to dance. At least I think they were trying to dance, they might've been just spazzing out. Or maybe Junior the Cop tazed a couple of them, I don't know.

So I got bored with that after awhile and headed back to the truck, laughing at all the soccer moms at the sidewalk tables outside the cafe clutching their purses closer and crossing their legs as I walked by with the camera turned on my phone, scouting for a camel toe.

After I got back underway, I pulled back into traffic and made a right turn, almost getting hit by a woman making a left in front of me while talking on the phone. Not only did she almost hit me but she didn't even slow down as I stomped on my brakes and leaned on the horn. When we ended up next to each other at the next light I rolled down my window and she did the same, oblivious to the fact that she almost wrecked my truck and pissed me off mightily in the process.
"I hope to fuck you're calling a goddamned driving school for lessons, Lady" I hollered. She just smiled, waved and drove off, still talking on the phone.
Fucking people - how in the hell did they survive without their electronic leashes?

Finally, my last stop was at a store where I needed to buy some III shit that I never bought before and wasn't sure how to go about buying it. So I go in and talk to the salesman and I make it very clear that I'm wanting to pay cash because I don't want a paper trail on this. I find what I need and go back up to pay for it and the first thing the motherfuckerfucker does is ask for my name and phone number. Oh, man.......
"Thomas Jefferson, 555-1776." Just like that. I used the 555 prefix.
"And how do you spell your last name, Mr. Jefferson?" Didn't say a thing about the 555 prefix.
Really? Are you fucking serious? Motherfucker, you just took US Government last semester!

Fuck, it was good to get back home. And Miss Lisa wonders how come I'm so cynical when it comes to my fellow man.

Gotta be California (again)

What, is there gonna be a test on that?

Can you say POISON?

BELCHERTOWN, Mass. (AP) — State wildlife authorities are investigating the grisly discovery of 14 dead coyotes at a Belchertown lumber yard.
Janis Sugrue, owner of Native Lumber Co., says she informed state environmental police on Monday after a neighbor riding her horse on her property, saw, and smelled, the carcasses.
Environmental police and a representative from the state Division of Fisheries and Wildlife visited the site Tuesday.
It is unclear where and how the animals died. Officials say there was no obvious evidence of gunshot wounds or trapping.
Ralph Taylor of the State Division of Fisheries and Wildlife says coyote hunting season ended on March 8 and noted that the dumping of animals is illegal.
Predator Xtreme

*****

Looks to me like somebody's herd or flock has been fucked with by coyotes and the problem was taken care of with poison, which is a shitty method of dealing with a problem like that.
Doesn't Masschusettes have Predation Permits that allow hunters to shoot problem animals even if they're not in season? Wait - we're talking Massachusettes here...... I forgot. Sorry.
Poison might have taken care of 14 coyotes, but it also took care of any loose domesticated dogs and any other animals that fed on carcasses that were missed being picked up. Hunting is a much more humane method of dealing with predation.

I know, I'm letting you down.

As most of you are well aware, my White Trash self is getting married tomorrow at 2 PM.
Because of all the little things that have to come together, posting is going to be very light today and tomorrow. I'll get some in tonight and maybe tomorrow in the morning, but there's not going to be a lot of midday posting. I hope y'all understand.
Fuck Obama.

Filling in the blanks

It’s spring break for the Obama daughters and mom has taken them West for the week. Michelle Obama and her daughters visited Mount Rushmore Wednesday to see the monument where four U.S. presidents are immortalized in stone on the soaring mountainside. She's probably there to see if there's room for a fifth, or maybe remodel one of the others to make it into a great big presidential idol.
Now the Obamas have arrived in Las Vegas for a private family visit. Never mnd that Vegas hates Obama because of his remarks about blowing money in Vegas.
At the depths of the recession, President Obama seemed to disparage Las Vegas visits, at one point warning hard-pressed Americans, “You don’t blow a bunch of cash in Vegas when you’re trying to save for college.” Try something to lower the price of gas, I can send 3 or 4 kids to college then.
There is lingering dismay in the Las Vegas travel and tourism industry but, during the political campaign which started in 2009, Obama has been a frequent visitor on official and political trips to the swing state of Nevada. He's been a frequent visitor to everywhere on his fundraiser tour. All on our dime.
The first lady’s private schedule with Sasha and Malia in Las Vegas is short. They travel on to California for publicly announced events, including a San Francisco political fundraiser Friday (what, again?), the Saturday commissioning of a new Coast Guard ship in Alameda, the USGS Mooch, and then a chance to meet music sensation Taylor Swift, who ought to tell her to fuck off.

Rule 5 or whatever

IT'S FRIDAY NIGGAS!!!!!

III Gear

I've made it a little easier for you to shop the III Gear shop featured in a post earlier today. If you'll go to my sidebar you'll see a new button like this:

Click on that button and you'll be redirected right to the site where you can score some cool shit and help to advance our cause at the same time.

Hey, I own at least one of everything sold there (I'm still waiting on a couple of newly introduced items) and I can personally attest to the quality of the goods that I have received. No cheap shit here, folks. You've got my word on that.

So stop by, put some money towards our Cause and thumb your nose at the feds by wearing our Brand.

Consider it as investing in our futures.

If you're a Conservative or a III Percenter blogger and you don't have a button to donate to III Gear or 527America, please consider putting one up. Let's get some traffic headed that way and raise a few bucks for 527America. It won't cost you a dime but it'll damned sure put a dollar where it's sorely needed right now.