Sunday, November 23, 2008

That'll teach you

The news story below reminds me of the time when I got arrested when I was 15-16 years old. I was handcuffed in the back of the car and decided to start mouthing off to the cop: "You ain't so tough, you fat sonofabitch. Pull this motherfucker over, take off my cuffs and your gun and I'll beat your ass."
The cop pretty much ignored me for awhile until he had enough of my bullshit, then said "Son, I can fuck you up without even getting out of this car."
Mouthy Me: "Yeah? Well, do it then, Asshole!"
He did. He hit the brakes, throwing me face first into the screen separating the back seat from the front seat, bloodying my nose and giving me a fat lip.
"Fucker! What the hell.... I'll have your ass for that!" I sputtered.
He just laughed. "What, you didn't see that dog that ran out in front of the car?"
I shut up.


LulaBelle said...

I laughed out loud-poor young you!

ibeam said...

I had a very similar experience in Philadelphia. I had gotten arrested for doing something really stupid and the police cuffed me and put me in the back of the paddy-wagon. They proceded to drive very fast over some railroad tracks, over and over, all the while I'm cuffed in the back, getting bounced all over the place, with my head hitting the top of the van. I can tell you, I wasn't very happy when they actually let me out.

wirecutter said...

Yeah Lulabelle, my dad thought it was fucking hilarious too. I, on the other hand, didn't see the humor in it at all. Not at the time, anyways.

Ibeam: I'm laughing my ass off right now.
And why is it almost 100% of my friends have a great arrest story?