Knuckledraggin My Life Away
Where bad choices make good stories
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Friday, October 09, 2026
Damn, those boys were serious
A man is fighting to survive after Memphis police said that he was beaten with sledgehammers, shot multiple times, and still managed to find help in time.
Control your animals or we'll hang 'em
A bridalwear shop owner who was found to have hung a seven-year-old from a coat hook until the child turned purple received an absolute discharge.
Calm the fuck down, it wasn't watermelon
Two siblings in Texas were recently arrested over a fight about fruit that devolved into death threats, Lone Star State police say.
Handguns in the US Army in World War Two
VIDEO HERE (11:24 minutes)
You'd think he'd know better
An attorney for quadruple murder suspect Austin Drummond is accused of threatening to shoot up Jackson City Hall.
Fuck, I hate people that do this
An elderly dog was abandoned by its heartless owner in an empty park in Washington after they drove away in their Cadillac, leaving the poor pet behind.
So did he bail out his main squeeze?
Prosecutors will not pursue criminal charges against the 22-year-old Florida Man who recently admitted to having sex with his mother over the past several years, records show.
Worked up an appetite, did ya?
In the middle of a nearly six-hour standoff with Gillette police, a pair of drunk and uncooperative brothers apparently got a little hungry, surprising law enforcement outside their Limecreek Avenue home when DoorDash showed up.
-JD
Tried to pet it, huh?
A wild video revealed the moment a huge elk headbutted a man, sending him flying into the air as onlookers honked their horns to scare the creature away.
They have that many muslims in New Zealand???
“I WANT TO FUCK THE KIWIBANK SHEEP,” the post reads. When it was originally sent out on X by the account @ehukuu on July 24, those words were accompanied by a gif of Kiwibank’s green-maned mascot Buck admiring her stylish new haircut. If you look at it now though, the gif is gone, replaced by a blank grey square containing 14 thudding words: “This media has been disabled in response to a report by the copyright owner.”
*yawn* Waffle House shenanigans
A woman was arrested after Lee County deputies said she exposed herself to a man during an argument, threatened him, and caused a disturbance outside a Waffle House on Sunday.
Aaand down in Florida.....
A Florida father said his family vacation to Central Florida theme parks was derailed after his 3-year-old daughter found a sex toy in their resort room at Holiday Inn Club Vacations’ Orange Lake Resort in Kissimmee.
Nice diversion
Thousands of dollars in cash were seen thrown from the window of a truck running from police in Texas, authorities said.
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