You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
You come back from the dump with more than you took.
You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
You have a rag for a gas cap.
You can spit without opening your mouth.
You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say 'Cool Whip' on the side.
The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.