Monday, October 12, 2009

Ah, the single life......

I have been up since 5 AM and haven't done a damned thing all day. Don't believe me? Here's my thought process over the past few minutes.

I'm fucking bored. I should do something.
What is there to do?
Go reload. No, I don't have any empty brass.
Go fish for a couple of hours. Naw, too fucking windy.
Go mow the yard. Uh-uh, I did that once already this year.
Vacuum. But then I'd have to brush out the dog or it'll be a waste of time.
Go brush out the dog. Ehhhh, he's sleeping.
Do the dishes. There's one fucking bowl and a spoon. Not worth getting up for.
Call your mother. Fuck that.
Go shopping. Naw, I got enough food to last for awhile.
Go make something to eat. What the fuck is there to eat?
Go water the yard. No, it's going to rain tomorrow anyways.
Go drop off the mortgage check. I'll do that when I pick up my prescription.
Go pick up your prescription. Maybe when I drop off the mortgage check.
Wash your truck. I did that a couple of months ago.
The phone's ringing. Better let the machine pick it up. It might be mom.
Turn on Fox news and see what that socialist cocksucker did to us today. Aaah, I'll do that later.
Do the laundry. What, do I look like a neat freak?
Go fuck with the Evil Cat. Naw, she's still pissed about last night.
Go change your oil. Get real, fucker.
Clean your 45. Hey, that's an id..... wait, I did that yesterday.
Fuuuuuuuuck!!!!!
Go write something on your blog. Yeah, what the fuck is there to write about? Having nothing to do?

7 comments:

Harlem's A Hatin said...

I love this post. That totally sounds like my Sunday....kind of. I shot a 45 for the first time at the end of September. Amazing, I am hooked!

Will said...

I thought you said today was the day you caught up on shit, man! Unless you did like me and set low expectations so you can take out the trash, flush the toilet, and cut those toe nails, then your done and can fuck off......maybe you should try masterbation.

wirecutter said...

Good deal, Harlem! Of all the reasons I can think of to own a gun, fun is at the top of my list.

wirecutter said...

Will, I did end up taking out the garbage. Yes, I did that. And I did vacuum, drop off my mortgage and picked up my prescription.
And Beat-off day was yesterday.

Tattoo Jim said...

Damn Wirecutter... if I didn't know any better I'd say you were retired! Either that or you've been spying on me... nah, that would have put you to sleep and you didn't write about that... as my grand-daddy used to say, "put it off till tomorrow, you've made enough mistakes for today"... he was a wise man!

wirecutter said...

I would of taken a couple of naps TJ, but I gotta get up early tomorrow to go through the same thing again at work.

Lula said...

That's awesome. Weird, deja vu just now....