Wednesday, August 25, 2010

New Fucking Neighbors (Pt. II)

So I get home tonight and cook my dinner and lunch for tomorrow and hear some more fucking noise next door.
Heavy sigh. I know I was an asshole last night, but we gotta live next to each other for a couple of years, I might need them to keep an eye on my place and feed CharlieGodammit when coyote shooting picks up, and they might even provide a handy alibi someday.
I knock on their door. Callie pops into view and casts a fearful look for Charlie. Crosses her legs just in case.
"Yes, SIR????"
"Lighten up, dammit. My name's Kenny. Sorry 'bout last night. I made you young folks dinner. Here."
"Dinner? Did you spit in it?"
Damn, I like this girl more and more.......
"Naw, fuck no. It's pork chops cooked in mushroom and celery soup. Kicks ass over smashed taters. Which I have thoughtfully included by the way."
"Why are you being nice?"
'Cause I might need something from you later? "Because I'm sorry. I just figured that with y'all working late, you ain't got time to make dinner. I got extra."
She takes the platter, plates, and silverware. "Well, maybe I was too harsh in judging you. Thank you."
I started down the porch and heard her tell her young fella, "Look Josh, that asshole neighbor brought us dinner!"
Josh answered "Did the motherfucker spit in it?"
I think were gonna get along just fine.......

9 comments:

Michelle said...

Mmmmm I'm hungry now. Thanks a lot!

PatAZ said...

Wish I had someone to fix supper for me. That sounds delicious.

drjim said...

yuk-yuk!

Just John said...

Priceless!

orbitup said...

Well they sound like they are just like you. That could go either way.

Anonymous said...

Dude,you have some of the funniest shit on algore's internets!I read your blog daily and love your Charliegoddammit stories.keep it up.

Threeper in Kommifornia.

Tom said...

Love it! I'm expecting more great stories about CGD and the new neighbors!

Tom

Lula said...

Aww, you old softy!

longrooffan said...

Well, end the suspense. Did you spit in it?