Sunday, April 24, 2011

Remind me to never piss them off

My neighbor across the street had married my pharmicist and shortly moved out because his new family had suddenly outgrown their home.
He rented the place out to a guy that said it was just him, his daughter and a roomie.
Well, guess what.
It turned into 4 or 5 adults living there with a BOY, and a non-stop party.
A couple of months ago, I heard an argument in the street and I jumped out and told the motherfuckers to either put it in the car or back in the house and the next thing I know, the cops are beating on my door saying I threatened them with a gun.
I invited the nice officers inside and explained things to them. They must've believed me, seeing as I didn't go to jail.
Yesterday, when I was picking up my blood pressure meds, Sarah asked how things we're going. I told her about the problems and she gave me her hubby's number, said if there were any more problems, to give him a call. She also mentioned that Bens' brother was on the local force.
Tonight, there was a problem. Loud music, shit being talked in the street, cars blocking driveways. I called Ben and within 15 minutes, cops were everywhere. I walked outside and explained who I was and they asked me to identify the cars that belonged to the neighbors on either side, explained that they had knocked on the door across the street with no answer and they were going to start issuing citations.
Not only that, but had they towed every fucking car that was even slightly blocking a driveway.
I'm glad me and Ben are on good terms........

13 comments:

Opus #6 said...

Don't mess with friends of Ben.

PatriotUSA said...

I have friends in the city police dept and the country sheriff. It has come in very handy, especially when the earth muffin family down the street has a drum circle late at night or they are out prancing around a fire in the backyard celebrating the full moon and chanting jibberish at the top of their lungs.

I have been accused of turning a hose on them(true, they smell bad from 50 feet away, and the women are hairy)cleaning my guns on the front steps or with the garage door open(so what), putting a pigs head in their mail box(true but was just a joke as they are vegans. Just having a little fun and yes, they are that stupid and irritating. They know better than step onto our property.

It is almost too easy to piss these tree huggers off and our local boys are always glad to come and issue tickets, tow away cars and at times arrest these moonbats.
Wouldn't ya know it, they are from Santa Cruz!

dhanna59 said...

Damm Wirecutter!
Next thing ya know you'll be on the Sheriff's Patrol(Auxilliary, unpaid volunteer, gotta buy your own uniform shirt and badge. Oh, can't carry a gun, either). Maybe you could get your old Boy Scout uniform out of a dufflebag and have it "Sherriffed Up".
How you like me now, buddy?
Signed,
your friend,
Derek

Bella said...

You're so fucken cute dhanna59, but you know, just know, who's gonna get it in the end. Well, at least I hope you do?

Game On! Kisses

dhanna59 said...

@BELLA, honey, you just gotta understand something. Me and KENNY get a kick out of messing with each other, it's a guy thing and you wouldn't understand, seriously... he doesn't anymore take what I say for certain than I do what he says... It's just male bantering and it's something we learned as young kids. Guy stuff, Okay? Except for the pic he secretly e-mailed to me on yahoo with his hair BUMPED and blowin me a kiss!!!I'll post it later!

dhanna59 said...

KEN,
Dammmm, I think somebody is HOT for the K59lane!!!! You need to get a passport andd take a vacation to Canada boy! I think your room and board is already covered and then some!....

wirecutter said...

Yeah, Bella.
FUCK YOU, DEREK!!!!!!

Bella said...

@dhanna59...yah, yah, yah, I know all that shit about male bonding. I know you're Buds. I simply wanted to bug you because I've had 6 beers. Kenny is a good friend to all, well unless you piss him off which I don't plan on doing. Or you either. :) I hope everyone is having a good day!

dhanna59 said...

Now, now, Kenny...
No need to get wrapped around the axle...I got it, BELLA is your girl, I give up, it's too obvious that you are the ONE she wants, anybody could tell. I've learned a good lesson here, don't get friendly with your friend's girlfriend.(or something or other!) Am I gonna have to take out a restraning order on you here Ken Lane in BEAUREGARD Parish, Louisiana? I think she just might come down here and cause some BIG TROUBLE....

wirecutter said...

I'd worry more about Derek, Bella. At least I'm sensitive......
And D, you promised not to mention that picture to anybody, you big brute, you.
Well, time to go kill something.

Bella said...

BWahahahahaha...Ooops

dhanna59 said...

@BELLA,
Now that I've let the cat outta the bag on Kenny's Hair Bump(ain't he sexy?)it's good to know that you understand and appreciate how us guys operate. A resounding "FUCK YOU"from Ken on a subject has multi-meanings. It could mean many things, among them could be; F U I wanna kill you!
F U I Hope You Die!
F U I hope your life Kills You!
F U I know your work Kills You!
F U Live with your EX- WIFE!
F U I hope she hangs around like BRONCHITIS!

Bella said...

Ya, or FU...I hope you have a really, really long life so Karma can kick you in the ass but good. What does that mean, when my friends tell me that? It's all good. Still looking at the grass from the right side and it's Spring.