Saturday, February 25, 2012

Fucking with the neighborette's mind

Miss Lisa went out and finally (!!!) bought a fucking car today so she drove it off the lot to show off and I went on my merry way stopping by the gunshop, used bookstore, the Dollar store for a weeks supply of rawhide bones (14 of the motherfuckers) for CharlieGodammit, and the Army/Navy Surplus before making it back home but still beating Lisa, nodding to my neighbors that I still don't know that were standing outside smoking a cigarette or joint. They seem like nice kids.
Parking being very limited at our new place, I ran through the house, unlocked the back gate, dragged CharlieGodammit inside the house and pulled the Bronco into the backyard. After I locked the back gate, I strolled back through the house to go to my Ranger and unload it, and when I walked out into the front yard, I heard the neighborette say with an incredulous look "What the fuck....? Didn't he just come home in one truck and leave in the other?"
Neighbor was a little quicker than I was. "Yeah, that's his twin brother."
She probably still thinks there's two of me, God help the world.

11 comments:

Jesus Barbie said...

Well, you are quite the magic man, Mr. Wirecutter!

Huckleberry said...

That settles it,it was a joint.

Swamprat said...

That's fuckin funny.

You'd have thunk, that...with a new person movin into the hood and all, SOMEBODY from the new hood, would have come over to check ya out and introduce themselves. That's what's wrong with america nowdays. Nobody's got no class or interest no more. Scared shitless Bitches.

Well, my hood has a Neighborhood watch program. I introduce myself, as the the block captain, and welcome them to the hood. Give em a signup sheet if they want to join.

New neighbor moves into my hood, I go over, introduce myself, and say welcome! Gives me a feel for them, and them a feel for me.

wirecutter said...

We've met very briefly, Swamprat.

Huck - my thoughts exactly.

Huckleberry said...

Im still trying to get over that 14 bones shit,That son of a bitch (CGD) must have teeth like Gary Busey!!

davecydell said...

Huh ?

Swamprat said...

"Huckleberry said...
That settles it,it was a joint."

Yup...I know the people in my hood...I can go hang out with and...burn one...:-)

Gettin damn few, and farther between though...
It worrys me...we're a dyin breed Huck. And...Ken my friend...you're gettin "Older too".

It fuckin sucks.

The "New Generation" is just waitin for all us older fucks to die off...THATS, their plan.

wirecutter said...

Yeah, no shit. He goes through 2 rawhide bones a day. Have to get them at the dollar store just to be able to afford them.
His fucking teeth are huge, sharp and shiny. And jaw power like you wouldn't believe, man. When we get to rough-housing, he usually draws bllod just by clamping down.

Brian in Florida said...

Wire I moved in about 14 years ago, last year my daughter moved int eb place beside me. When I moved in the Hood here ignored me and never once said Howdy or helloe so I kept it that way. My daughter ahd her husband have a band, they went to all the next door to ask permission to practive 7 to 10 at night all said yes but 2 said well we dont mind, but they guy living next to you might. Daughter and son in law laughed, son in law said, I think it will be OK, I married his daughter.
Yea,, not a close hood, however I do tell the teen kids living here when I go on Leave, I tell them, watch my place, the cops know I am gonna leave and I need you to tell me how many times they patroll. So far, pretty effective, no breakins.

SPON said...

I had an elderly couple next door years back that would call me on the phone if I were grillin' burgers and announce that they would like one. I always brought two. Now I think some creep from the witness protect. program lives there.

Cheesy said...

"Huckleberry said...
That settles it,it was a joint."
Yep!
Same Huckleberry?
C.C.