My buddy Rick's brother died Saturday from diabetic complications. I really like Rick, he's one of those guys that can keep me laughing and joking for hours on end so I figured that a collection needed to be taken up for him. Unfortunately, I am not the one to be taking up a collection - it's hard for me to ask somebody for money for any reason when I've told them to fuck off just the day before so I decided to wait for the Whiney Li'l Bitch to come back to work from one of his many complaints and ailments and ask him if he would do it. He agreed (he's buddies with Rick too) and waited 'til today (payday) to start it up. Anyways, I wandered in this morning and saw WLB making up a collection box and said "Here, Lisa gave me 50 bucks to put in for Rick" and held out a 20 dollar bill.
"Um, that's only a twenty, Bro" he says.
"Yeah I know. I spent thirty on dope."
The Whiney Li'l Bitch's dad was killed shortly after Greg started out there about 20 years ago, broke his neck when his tractor flipped on him. One day we were working together and he called me a fucking Okie. Now Greg is an Okie boy himself and I swear, before I could stop myself I said "I'm a fucking Okie? At least none of my relations was killed by a farming implement, not in recent memory anyways."
"FUCK YOU, I HOPE YOU DIE IN A GODDAMNED CAR FIRE!!!" He was pissed.
Touchy motherfucker, I swear......