Yeah man, so I'm trying to keep a low profile nowadays after moving due to trouble and threats from shitheads like Firestone, PETAphiles and other assorted liberals, bitches and punks that feel like I should give a fuck about what they think. I mean, if it was just me I wouldn't trip on it but I've got Lisa to worry about too and there's no telling what unstable people might do. Anyways, we talked and I promised that I wouldn't disclose our new location, the problem being the amount of mail and packages that I swap around with other Patriots but seeing as I've never actually met these folks it would be very easy for the new location to get out, you understand.
The solution of course was to get a PO box for that and I might as well get it in Ceres seeing as I still pass through there on the way home, plus I still do a fair amount of time there shopping and visiting and shit. Perfect - saves gas as far as trips to the post office and again, lets me hide out and feel sneaky and shit.
So anyways, I had to mail a package today so I figured that I might as well get it over with. While I was there I asked to rent a PO box. The clerk hands me an application and then tells me I have to submit 2 forms of ID, 2 utility bills to prove residency and 44 bucks US.
What the fuck? Last time I rented a box I just had to show an ID. What the fuck is this proof of residency shit? I never had to do that before - granted, it's been a few years since I got a PO box but still.... you don't even need proof of residency to vote or work in this country.
So I mail the package, go back home, dig through a bunch of files and find two bills from the old place and drive my ass back to the Ceres post office in the 90 degree heat.
HE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK AT THE FUCKING BILLS, MAN. He went over the application, checked my CDL and work ID and glanced at the hand that I had the folded up bills in. They could've been my truck registration and insurance papers for all he knew.
Yeah, so the upshot is that I got the box. You can now mail me shit like donations, poison pen letters and dried meats as well as payments for items listed at the Patriot Swap Shop at the address in the Bullet-Bone-Bail Fund donation box in my sidebar.
