So I'm steam-cleaning my carpet (so much for having a life) and I turn around and see that the mail has run.
It's the usual stuff - Fishing, hunting and shooting magazines, a couple of bills, a bunch of garbage and my monthly issue of Cosmopolitan that's addressed to the woman 2 streets down.
I take a break, stuff in a chew and read the article on 50 Ways to a Healthy Vagina (if my dick gave me that much trouble I'd cut it off) before walking down and giving to Amanda.
"Hey Ken, got my Cosmo again?"
"Yup, and the article about a clean vagina is really informative. Not that you probably need it, but hey! why take chances?"
She starts laughing, called me and asshole and wanted to know if I wanted to go in half with her on her subscription.
Now why would I do that when I can just read her magazine every month?
There are advantages to having our bits 'n pieces on the outside.
ReplyDeleteOf course there are disadvantages, too.
Try explaining a sore on your wee-wee from a zipper snag to your sweetie.
ReplyDeleteDo you think it's possible women will find you more sensitive now that you can relate to them about having a healthy vagina? haha I'm just kidding with you, but I have to say, I never ever thought I'd read that, written by you. I kind of had to read it twice. I really do like your blog though.
ReplyDeleteOh ya and Merry Christmas!
Maybe you're just getting in touch with your feminine inner side? First you steam clean the carpet, next...you're a domestic goddess. Keep reading their Cosmo. (I just might catch hell over this)
ReplyDeleteBill - More sensitive? I was just looking for hot babes.
ReplyDeleteAnd Merry Christmas to you too.
Bella - My dog puked on the carpet and then rolled in it. I had no choice but to steam clean the whole thing unless I wanted a dirty carpet with a clean spot in the middle of it.
Nothing in Cosmo about cleaning doggie puke out of the carpet. But I'll keep checking....