Now if he'd just fetch the mail without killing it first

CharlieGodammits' latest grin is attacking the mail slot next to the front door at random times throughout the day and evening. I mean it, that silly fucker can be dead-ass asleep in the middle of the floor or getting his ass scratched and all of a sudden he'll jam the mail slot.
I don't know if it's because he heard something outside and seeing as most of the time when somebody comes up the porch they stick something through the slot, or if he's trying to ambush something or just hoping to get lucky with a random attack.
I gotta admit, he does keep me guessing as to what he's going to come up with next, and no, nothing he does surprises me - not too much - anymore.