After waiting for a concrete sidewalk to set, a young fleshy headed mutant, with his head buried in his phone, walked down the new concrete. I hollered, he sheepishly apologized "I didn't notice" and stepped over to continue his journey on the grass.
Since it's the modern times, I couldn't beat him severely with a finishing handle, but the urge was strong.
2) It took about 10 years of being out of Engineering school before I stopped having the nightmare of forgetting there was a test every single night. That one hits really close to home. Ouch! The funny part is that both my sons are now in that post college nightmare mode. I'm betting a lot readers have been through it.
5) Speaking of Turtles - here's a comment I made over at Phil's the other day: I loved collecting tortoises and turtles when I was kid. I had a 10 inch diameter Red Eared Slider that would just hang out in the tiny pond created by the A/C condensate at Mom’s house in San Antonio. He would come out of the water when I put some food out and then go back in. That son of bitch would bite and bite hard if you ever got a finger in striking distance. You had to be real careful around him. He finally ran off one day and he was faster than you think. If you ever catch a softshell out on land you might be real surprised too. Check this out:
I too had Engineering school dreams for about 10 years after graduating, All centered around my school informing me I had to come back since I missed an exam and had to take the course over in order to graduate. At that point I would wake up from my nightmare.
#2 actually happened to me. I skipped the class where the professor advised of the change in date of the final exam. He was kind enough to allow me to take an oral exam (no, not that kind).
I don't remember High School all that much but it seems every teacher I had did inform the class several times prior to exams of the date and time of the exams.
I distinctly remember in college and uni, every instructor stated on the very first day when exams were scheduled. Then, throughout the term, each instructor would repeat the schedule. As well, in most of the classes, there was a printed handout showing the exam schedules. I was not the most studious, I wouldn't even rank among them, but I would shake my head that students would still question when an exam was scheduled or, to the amusement of others, would protest that they should be allowed to take the exam which they 'didn't know' when it was scheduled. We're adults, right?
#3 Towing something that large or heavy should require the driver to be more prudent. If he had to make a sudden stop because he thought wrong that he could make the light, he is acting as an idiot. Stupid should hurt.
The very best story I have about the clueless walking through fresh concrete involves a drop dead gorgeous young woman. And the dresses she wore, holy cow! If you have it, flaunt it. And she sure did have the body for those sheer and skimpy dresses!
I was downtown on a total remodel of a 240 year old building to be turned into a restaurant. The office drones would walk by on their way to and from lunch. All the guys on the project got to know the lunch schedules of the office workers, especially the aforementioned lass. We'd all stop work and gather in the front for a view as she strolled by. Wow, what a sight she was!
Then comes the day that I had poured several feet of new sidewalk. It was also the day the carpet guys came. So they laid out the carpet rolls on the street which blocked nearly the entire width. And with the orange cones, yellow tape, upturned buckets, and saw horses I had laid out to protect the fresh concrete, passerbys could walk only on the sidewalk on the other side of the street. Some refused to accept that inconvenience.
Like that beautiful woman. Oh, what hassle in her precious life that she would have to walk around. The stream of loud protests punctuated with threats of siccing the authorities on us - on me! - and insisting on having our names for 'the report' issued from her pretty mouth became a source of mirth to us. That her utterances did not yield the intended dread in us only served to heighten her passions.
'Don't tell me where to walk!", she spat as I repeated my cautions to her. Well, at your leave, M'lady. This will be good. On the first step she lost one lovely high heel. The second step, off came the second shoe. She defiantly strode forth pretending to not notice that she was now walking in nylons in wet mud. Once again on solid sidewalk, she spun and sputtered in red-faced rage. "Look what you have done! I am going to have you arrested. Stop laughing! Now give me back my shoes!"
I gingerly dunked each shoe into a bucket of water then used a brush to whisk away the globules of concrete. After that day, her exhibition having completely destroyed our illusion of charm in her, none of the guys would stop work to watch her pass by. A few of the guys came up with unkind nicknames for her which were loudly proclaimed as she drew near. All agreed our pity should fall on him who was in any sort of a relationship with her.
Not exactly. Naw, I was done with her. A real pain in the ass she was. She stormed off in her muddy nylons. I babysat that concrete until after quitting time.
If the guy in #3 had tied the boat down to the trailer, he'd have been perfectly fine. But no, he was lazy and didn't bother with two lousy ratchet straps.
I recall walking into a lecture hall for a history class I skipped a lot only to find everyone had a blue book on their desk. I promptly walked to the admin building and dropped the class. That was a hard lesson in paying attention.
#3 "An object in motion remains in motion until acted upon by an outside force." - I. Newton. The outside force, in this case, being the pickup truck. Ah, a Chevy. That explains a lot.
I am a perfesser meself, and we just got done with our fall term. Of course, the day after I turned in grades to the registrar, I got a number of cheerful emails:
Hello, I was wondering if there was anyway possible you could open up the exit assessment for me I thought it was not due until Saturday but when I tried to go do it, it was closed. Thank you
My reply:
Hello,
Seeing as the open and close dates were listed in the course calendar on the syllabus, and that I announced them twice at the start of each class for four days running, along with the phrase "please remember, this is a hard deadline," no.
And then I got this gem:
Hey sir. I’m sorry but I could have swore that I saw PM on the final exam. I am extremely distraught. Is there any way or not that I could take this?? I have had a long week dealing with this sickness being in the hospital. I had just got out from it. And was ready to take it today?? If you could please consider me and let me do this. I have never missed anything like this. I’m at a loss for words sir please. I have had a lot going on. I have been in the hospital with a family member. I have also came down sick. I misunderstood the email you sent. I feel so stupid. I am completely sorry. I can get it done within a hour if you let me.
This is after I sent the following email to the class:
Ladies and Gentlemen--
A switch was not flipped correctly on the Final Exam, and several people who tried to find it were unable to do so. I have corrected this mistake, and have extended the due date to NOON (it says 11:59 a.m., but I don't want any confusion) on Saturday, 12 December.
Hell I always look at the word "NOON" and think, "Okay, that means midnight!"
We have a plague of stinkbugs this year. I was eating a salad before dinner and my wife asked me to do something. I sat down to eat and noticed an odd smell; the first bite of salad was nasty as could be. I looked down and there was a stink bug in my salad that had outgassed when I hit him with the spoon. Bye Bye salad.
After waiting for a concrete sidewalk to set, a young fleshy headed mutant, with his head buried in his phone, walked down the new concrete. I hollered, he sheepishly apologized "I didn't notice" and stepped over to continue his journey on the grass.
ReplyDeleteSince it's the modern times, I couldn't beat him severely with a finishing handle, but the urge was strong.
2) It took about 10 years of being out of Engineering school before I stopped having the nightmare of forgetting there was a test every single night. That one hits really close to home. Ouch! The funny part is that both my sons are now in that post college nightmare mode. I'm betting a lot readers have been through it.
ReplyDelete5) Speaking of Turtles - here's a comment I made over at Phil's the other day:
I loved collecting tortoises and turtles when I was kid. I had a 10 inch diameter Red Eared Slider that would just hang out in the tiny pond created by the A/C condensate at Mom’s house in San Antonio. He would come out of the water when I put some food out and then go back in. That son of bitch would bite and bite hard if you ever got a finger in striking distance. You had to be real careful around him. He finally ran off one day and he was faster than you think. If you ever catch a softshell out on land you might be real surprised too. Check this out:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71G5meL_lDM
I too had Engineering school dreams for about 10 years after graduating, All centered around my school informing me I had to come back since I missed an exam and had to take the course over in order to graduate. At that point I would wake up from my nightmare.
Delete#2 actually happened to me. I skipped the class where the professor advised of the change in date of the final exam. He was kind enough to allow me to take an oral exam (no, not that kind).
ReplyDeleteA change in schedule would be the ONLY time a make-up would be allowed. Well, that or a medical excuse. No, the funeral for grandpa doesn't count.
Delete#4 - There is nothing wrong with wavy pizza.
ReplyDelete#9 - The turtle is slow, but he gets the job done.
I don't remember High School all that much but it seems every teacher I had did inform the class several times prior to exams of the date and time of the exams.
ReplyDeleteI distinctly remember in college and uni, every instructor stated on the very first day when exams were scheduled. Then, throughout the term, each instructor would repeat the schedule. As well, in most of the classes, there was a printed handout showing the exam schedules. I was not the most studious, I wouldn't even rank among them, but I would shake my head that students would still question when an exam was scheduled or, to the amusement of others, would protest that they should be allowed to take the exam which they 'didn't know' when it was scheduled. We're adults, right?
#3 Towing something that large or heavy should require the driver to be more prudent. If he had to make a sudden stop because he thought wrong that he could make the light, he is acting as an idiot. Stupid should hurt.
ReplyDeleteThe very best story I have about the clueless walking through fresh concrete involves a drop dead gorgeous young woman. And the dresses she wore, holy cow! If you have it, flaunt it. And she sure did have the body for those sheer and skimpy dresses!
I was downtown on a total remodel of a 240 year old building to be turned into a restaurant. The office drones would walk by on their way to and from lunch. All the guys on the project got to know the lunch schedules of the office workers, especially the aforementioned lass. We'd all stop work and gather in the front for a view as she strolled by. Wow, what a sight she was!
Then comes the day that I had poured several feet of new sidewalk. It was also the day the carpet guys came. So they laid out the carpet rolls on the street which blocked nearly the entire width. And with the orange cones, yellow tape, upturned buckets, and saw horses I had laid out to protect the fresh concrete, passerbys could walk only on the sidewalk on the other side of the street. Some refused to accept that inconvenience.
Like that beautiful woman. Oh, what hassle in her precious life that she would have to walk around. The stream of loud protests punctuated with threats of siccing the authorities on us - on me! - and insisting on having our names for 'the report' issued from her pretty mouth became a source of mirth to us. That her utterances did not yield the intended dread in us only served to heighten her passions.
'Don't tell me where to walk!", she spat as I repeated my cautions to her. Well, at your leave, M'lady. This will be good. On the first step she lost one lovely high heel. The second step, off came the second shoe. She defiantly strode forth pretending to not notice that she was now walking in nylons in wet mud. Once again on solid sidewalk, she spun and sputtered in red-faced rage. "Look what you have done! I am going to have you arrested. Stop laughing! Now give me back my shoes!"
I gingerly dunked each shoe into a bucket of water then used a brush to whisk away the globules of concrete. After that day, her exhibition having completely destroyed our illusion of charm in her, none of the guys would stop work to watch her pass by. A few of the guys came up with unkind nicknames for her which were loudly proclaimed as she drew near. All agreed our pity should fall on him who was in any sort of a relationship with her.
Surely, Miss. My name is Mike Hunt. Tell the police you saw and spoke with me personally.
DeleteI'll bet you forgot to tell her she needed to wash the concrete off her feet too.
Delete#9: Turtle soup tonight.
Not exactly. Naw, I was done with her. A real pain in the ass she was. She stormed off in her muddy nylons. I babysat that concrete until after quitting time.
DeleteIf the guy in #3 had tied the boat down to the trailer, he'd have been perfectly fine. But no, he was lazy and didn't bother with two lousy ratchet straps.
DeleteI recall walking into a lecture hall for a history class I skipped a lot only to find everyone had a blue book on their desk. I promptly walked to the admin building and dropped the class. That was a hard lesson in paying attention.
ReplyDelete#3 "An object in motion remains in motion until acted upon by an outside force." - I. Newton. The outside force, in this case, being the pickup truck. Ah, a Chevy. That explains a lot.
ReplyDeleteI am a perfesser meself, and we just got done with our fall term. Of course, the day after I turned in grades to the registrar, I got a number of cheerful emails:
ReplyDeleteHello,
I was wondering if there was anyway possible you could open up the exit assessment for me I thought it was not due until Saturday but when I tried to go do it, it was closed.
Thank you
My reply:
Hello,
Seeing as the open and close dates were listed in the course calendar on the syllabus, and that I announced them twice at the start of each class for four days running, along with the phrase "please remember, this is a hard deadline," no.
And then I got this gem:
Hey sir. I’m sorry but I could have swore that I saw PM on the final exam. I am extremely distraught. Is there any way or not that I could take this?? I have had a long week dealing with this sickness being in the hospital. I had just got out from it. And was ready to take it today?? If you could please consider me and let me do this. I have never missed anything like this. I’m at a loss for words sir please. I have had a lot going on. I have been in the hospital with a family member. I have also came down sick. I misunderstood the email you sent. I feel so stupid. I am completely sorry. I can get it done within a hour if you let me.
This is after I sent the following email to the class:
Ladies and Gentlemen--
A switch was not flipped correctly on the Final Exam, and several people who tried to find it were unable to do so. I have corrected this mistake, and have extended the due date to NOON (it says 11:59 a.m., but I don't want any confusion) on Saturday, 12 December.
Hell I always look at the word "NOON" and think, "Okay, that means midnight!"
We have a plague of stinkbugs this year. I was eating a salad before dinner and my wife asked me to do something. I sat down to eat and noticed an odd smell; the first bite of salad was nasty as could be. I looked down and there was a stink bug in my salad that had outgassed when I hit him with the spoon. Bye Bye salad.
ReplyDeleteI haven't seen hardly any here since the weather turned, actually, in the past couple months. They were everywhere last year, though.
Delete#3: Well, I hope the drain plug was installed.
ReplyDelete