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Wednesday, June 15, 2022

Wait..... WHAT??!!

BENTONVILLE, Ark. - Walmart announced it has removed Chaokoh coconut milk from its shelves following two undercover investigations by animal rights organization PETA. 

PETA accused the coconut milk brand of using chained and caged monkeys in its production, leading to 86,000 e-mails to Walmart from PETA supporters requesting the product be pulled from its stores.

*****

I had no idea they used monkeys in its production. I mean, I haven't heard of a single monkey whining about raising its minimum wage to 15 bucks an hour or having to come in instead of working from home.

22 comments:

  1. I think they should stop carrying milk too. Poor cows get their tits pulled all the time. How fucking mean is that?

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  2. Perhaps 'monkey' is a euphemism?

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  3. Isn't calling them monkeys supposed to be racist, or something?

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    1. Being called a monkey is a horrid insult, but for some reason African Americans and their guilt ridden white supporters, think you are associating the monkeys with the African American Negro .... that's just racist. I call a monkey and monkey and a spade a spade and that's it. If you want visualized African Americans as monkeys .... I can see why. Some of the Af-Am behavior is quite like monkey business, as per BLM

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  4. Fuck PETA, where can I buy Chaokoh coconut milk?


    And, Fuck Joe Biden!

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  5. I guess it is important to mention 86,000 e-mails. Because such claim is valid only in democracy, which mob rule is.

    So if 86,000 prisoners e-mail the warden to be released, they should be released. Democracy in action.

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    Replies
    1. They were all from the same account.

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  6. You must have missed the 'closing the banana gap' debates of 2020, then. Very important stuff.

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  7. People Eating Tasty Animals are starting to piss me off. Fucking social media allows a tiny percentage of the population to phuk things up for the rest of us.

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  8. So, the coconut milk was really monkey milk?

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  9. Well ... you can't spread monkey pox without monkeys, or at least someone who fucks monkeys as we have seen in the province of Quebec in the men's gay community ... one or more of those guys have been monkeying around .....

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  10. I think the beef is that the monkeys climb the palm trees to get the coconuts.

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  11. I would assume they’re using the monkeys to pick the coconuts.
    Since monkeys live in trees….
    Doesn’t that qualify as “working from home”?

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  12. So what else is an upwardly mobile monkey supposed to do to make an honest living? I remember seeing this 40 years ago in Thailand. A man would bicycle around the neighborhood with a monkey sitting on the handlebars. If your coconuts were ready to harvest you could either pay cash or split the harvest with him. The monkey would scurry up the tree and could tell which coconuts were ready and which ones were still green. The silly part about this whole story is that if the monkeys aren't allowed to harvest the job will be done by young men, including underage children.

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  13. My bad. When they said monkeys, I didn't think they meant monkey monkeys.

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  14. To be fair, their boast was "Untouched by human hands during manufacture". So what are they complaining about?

    Phil B

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  15. Ha ha! I read today that they're changing the name of Monkey Pox because it might be racist. Who in the hell are the racists again?

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  16. illegal aliens hired to milk monkeys twice a day on Bill Gates' dairy farm

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  17. Hey, this isn't one of those sneaky "guess the race" stories, now, is it?

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  18. TMK, this is normal practice for harvesting coconuts since people don't have to climb the trees nor lug around heavy equipment. It's cheaper and safer for everyone involved and IIRC, the monkeys are well cared for / compensated. Not the first time I've heard the screaming over this, probably won't be the last.

    -arc

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