#8 ... I have always been awful at recognizing people whom I should know. Something innate wrong with me. One evening a whole lifetime ago, a buddy of mine and I were manning the door at the nightclub where we worked, rating the girls as they approached the club from the lot across the street. At one point, he stops and says, "Now HERE comes a ten!" I looked, saw a slim, cute chick hurrying along by herself with a sexy hip swing, and remarked, "Meh, looks young."
It was my live-in girlfriend, now wife of many years. My buddy recognized her from across the street but I didn't. She is 3 years my senior, yet on a quick glimpse from a short distance I thought she looked too young. True story.
It's not as uncommon as you think. I can be introduced to somebody and not recognize them 10 minutes later, no matter how hard I try. It's not everybody I meet but it happens often enough that it can be embarrassing.
Try being a doorman (as I was at the nightclub) unable to recognize people you know, let alone someone you just met. Worst possible occupation for someone like me. People (mostly women) were forever getting furious with me for not recognizing them just moments after they stepped out the door for a breath of air when I tried charging them again to come back in. Happened all the effin' time. They thought I was messing with them.
Actually, up until about 10 years ago, I had a phenomenal memory for names. You could bring up a name in a casual conversation and 10 years later I'd remember it.
I had to give up my 'civic duty' job as an election worker because I had the book all the A-K voters had to sigh. I'd see one of my neighbors walk in the door and I'm thinking, "Please God, let him go to the L-Z book." But no, he'd walk over, say hello to me, and there I sat, looking at him like a deer in the headlights.
I teach history, so I have the standard excuse of "I'll forget your name because if you haven't been dead for fifty years, I have no idea who you are."
#12 - Potty humor FTW! Poop jokes aren't my favorite, but they are a solid number two! #16 - That looked like a sandwich to me too. Still looks more like a sandwich than a shoe. #18 - Which movie is that from? I'm assuming it's from some movie that I probably skipped out on watching. 3,4,6,8,9,10,11 - honorable mentions. Impressive crop today!
Portland Oregon has Benson Bubblers, usually 4 poster installed by a local plutocrat because his workmen kept missing work on Monday because "I was thirsty and there wasn't anything to drink but beer."
In SE Wisconsin, a water fountain is definitely and invariably a 'bubbler'. Story I heard was that some very local, and long gone, company had that as a brand name, and it stuck. Could be. It is definitely a 'tell' for those who grew up in SE Wisconsin. Nowhere else.
Your story is probably very close to the truth. I know fence stretchers are all pretty much called Goldenrods no matter what the actual brand is - not because they invented them but because they're in widespread usage and they're just so damned good for the job.
7: Drinking fountain (Canadian prairies.) In HS the janitor used to run all of ours for 20 minutes when he got in in the morning (he came up with some coat hanger contraptions to keep the knob turned.) Looking back I'm sure it had nothing to do with lead in the pipes.
9: Release the files, and let everyone be tried in the court of public opinion while everything winds through the federal courts. Trump's instincts are damn good and he's figured out it won't go away so he might as well let it fly.
14: If it's a dude I'll just politely say hi. If it's a cute girl I'll awkwardly try talking to her. If it's a fat girl she'll awkwardly try talking to me. It's a rare person I actually get along with, and that's all on me being antisocial .
15: I've watched two YouTube shorts of people in little cars being assholes and getting rammed by big trucks today. They were both glorious.
2. Skyrim? 7. The thing you drink water from in school is water bottle. At least if you value your health. 8. The noise I maybe hate most is from loud internal combustion engines combined with ghetto blaster stereos at 23pm - 03am, under my window. I sincerely hope their engines explode.
All comments are moderated due to spam, drunks and trolls. Keep 'em civil, coherent, short, and on topic. Posted comments are the opinions of the commenters, not the site administrator.
#7 Umm Wisconsin, that's a bong, you're not supposed to drink the water.
ReplyDeleteHa! Back in the early 70's I had a friend who used to drink the bong water. I wonder what ever happened to him?
Delete#8 ... I have always been awful at recognizing people whom I should know. Something innate wrong with me. One evening a whole lifetime ago, a buddy of mine and I were manning the door at the nightclub where we worked, rating the girls as they approached the club from the lot across the street. At one point, he stops and says, "Now HERE comes a ten!" I looked, saw a slim, cute chick hurrying along by herself with a sexy hip swing, and remarked, "Meh, looks young."
ReplyDeleteIt was my live-in girlfriend, now wife of many years. My buddy recognized her from across the street but I didn't. She is 3 years my senior, yet on a quick glimpse from a short distance I thought she looked too young. True story.
MG
It's not as uncommon as you think. I can be introduced to somebody and not recognize them 10 minutes later, no matter how hard I try. It's not everybody I meet but it happens often enough that it can be embarrassing.
DeleteAnd fuggedabout remembering names.
DeleteTry being a doorman (as I was at the nightclub) unable to recognize people you know, let alone someone you just met. Worst possible occupation for someone like me. People (mostly women) were forever getting furious with me for not recognizing them just moments after they stepped out the door for a breath of air when I tried charging them again to come back in. Happened all the effin' time. They thought I was messing with them.
DeleteMG
Actually, up until about 10 years ago, I had a phenomenal memory for names. You could bring up a name in a casual conversation and 10 years later I'd remember it.
DeleteI had to give up my 'civic duty' job as an election worker because I had the book all the A-K voters had to sigh. I'd see one of my neighbors walk in the door and I'm thinking, "Please God, let him go to the L-Z book." But no, he'd walk over, say hello to me, and there I sat, looking at him like a deer in the headlights.
DeleteFaces? I don’t know, I might be somewhat face blind but voices I have locked down.
DeleteI teach history, so I have the standard excuse of "I'll forget your name because if you haven't been dead for fifty years, I have no idea who you are."
Delete#16 What is she holding?
ReplyDeleteAn upside down shoe. You can see the Nike emblem.
DeleteMost countries that have soccer as a national sport are socialist. Therefore, it's more than a shoe; it's a soup started! With vegetables included!
DeleteAgghhhhhh.
DeleteStill looked like a giant sammich.
Naw, that's a sandwich.
Delete12 - - - LOL
ReplyDelete#12 - Potty humor FTW! Poop jokes aren't my favorite, but they are a solid number two!
ReplyDelete#16 - That looked like a sandwich to me too. Still looks more like a sandwich than a shoe.
#18 - Which movie is that from? I'm assuming it's from some movie that I probably skipped out on watching.
3,4,6,8,9,10,11 - honorable mentions. Impressive crop today!
John G.
#18 is from Fast Times at Ridgemont High, from 1982.
DeleteChadd, these days she's known as "Mrs. Kevin Kline", but yes that was an epic moment in cinema history.
DeleteThese are funny and #16 does look like a sammy
ReplyDeleteIt really does. Took me about forty seconds.
DeleteJulia loves getting stoned and riding her paint horse. Nice.
ReplyDelete#13 - Beats the hell out of the neighbor's yappy dogs going off a 5:00 am and not shutting up till 12:30 am.
ReplyDeleteHad a neighbor's dog that would do that except it was a hound mix and howled.
DeleteThen I bought a paintball gun and got a 56 caliber roundball mold that fit nicely in the freezer.
👍
DeleteCoelacanth
# 6 Starting early
ReplyDelete# 10 Concealed carry
# 18 Growing up with 2 sisters with lots of pretty friends I grew up early
# 20 They both are
JD
I love #20! BTW how's your wife? I hope she's on the mend. You might check out DMSO and Invermectin. Both can work wonders for a variety of ailments.
ReplyDeleteMight want to check out Amanita muscaria...
Delete18 from movie "Fast Times at Ridgemont High"
ReplyDeletePortland Oregon has Benson Bubblers, usually 4 poster installed by a local plutocrat because his workmen kept missing work on Monday because "I was thirsty and there wasn't anything to drink but beer."
ReplyDeleteIn SE Wisconsin, a water fountain is definitely and invariably a 'bubbler'. Story I heard was that some very local, and long gone, company had that as a brand name, and it stuck. Could be. It is definitely a 'tell' for those who grew up in SE Wisconsin. Nowhere else.
ReplyDeleteYour story is probably very close to the truth. I know fence stretchers are all pretty much called Goldenrods no matter what the actual brand is - not because they invented them but because they're in widespread usage and they're just so damned good for the job.
Deletehttps://onwisconsin.uwalumni.com/bubbler-a-secret-code/
DeleteWiscoDave
7: Drinking fountain (Canadian prairies.) In HS the janitor used to run all of ours for 20 minutes when he got in in the morning (he came up with some coat hanger contraptions to keep the knob turned.) Looking back I'm sure it had nothing to do with lead in the pipes.
ReplyDelete9: Release the files, and let everyone be tried in the court of public opinion while everything winds through the federal courts. Trump's instincts are damn good and he's figured out it won't go away so he might as well let it fly.
14: If it's a dude I'll just politely say hi. If it's a cute girl I'll awkwardly try talking to her. If it's a fat girl she'll awkwardly try talking to me. It's a rare person I actually get along with, and that's all on me being antisocial .
15: I've watched two YouTube shorts of people in little cars being assholes and getting rammed by big trucks today. They were both glorious.
#6- The portion of your brain that's devoted to flipping the bird is larger than the portions for sight and language combined- true fact!
ReplyDelete2. Skyrim?
ReplyDelete7. The thing you drink water from in school is water bottle. At least if you value your health.
8. The noise I maybe hate most is from loud internal combustion engines combined with ghetto blaster stereos at 23pm - 03am, under my window. I sincerely hope their engines explode.
#7 there’s a little bit of green-for-bubbler on the easternmost end of Massachusetts. I grew up calling it a bubbler.
ReplyDeleteThen I escaped
Coelacanth
Can relate to that.
DeleteAnd water fountains are found in city parks, and in the middle of the fountain is a statue with water peeing out of one or more orifices.
#1 Only sixteen years separate Grease from Pulp Fiction. 31 years separate Pulp Fiction from right now.
ReplyDelete