Friday, June 11, 2010

Never piss off a redneck

Okay, I'm sitting here in my BassPro camouflage easy chair watching Fox News with my front door open and the lesbian couple across the street are pissing me the fuck off.
Not because they're gay - I'm from Kalifornia, remember? - but because they are assaulting my senses with 70s disco. Disco? I didn't even like that shit in the 70s.
I went over and politely (really) asked them if they would kindly turn it down. Apparently they have a party scheduled later and have started drinking a little early. They did agree and did turn it down for about 20 minutes. Then it crept back up to it's original level of disturbing.
All right, Motherfuckers. It's on now.
Tonight your party guests are get serenaded by coyote howls, dying rabbit screams and coon squalls.

8 comments:

Deb said...

"...serenaded by coyote howls, dying rabbit screams and coon squalls."

What's the difference between that and disco?

wirecutter said...

Basically the same thing but without the jungle bird sounds.

Bella said...

So how did that all work out for you last night? Only one thing worse than humming Stayin' Alive in the morning and that's a Stones song. Ha ha. Happy Saturday and don't fret about Charliegodammit. He's only doing what doggies do. Tough fucker though.

cbullitt said...

Disco is why I drank my way through the late '70s.
At least that's what I tell people who ask why I didn't finish college until the early '90s.
Hey, it took a long time--like all of the '80s--to recover from that incessant, omnipresent, stupid bass-line.

Skip said...

I kinda handle these with open carry.
Ring the bell, give 'em the LOOK, and when they see the hogleg it sorta tones down a taste.
YMMV

drjim said...

Yeah, I'm curious too about how it worked out.

Bunk Strutts said...

There's an awesome recording that always worked for me during the stereowars of the early 80s:
HOLLERIN'. Now it's preserved on CD.
http://www.amazon.com/Hollerin-Leonard-Emmanuel/dp/B0000002DA
Crank it up, and it'll stop anyone in their tracks. It's a pure mental WTF moment for them.

BobG said...

The only thing worse than disco is rap.