Monday, April 04, 2011

Burning the koran

So there's this big deal about Terry Jones burning the koran and starting a bunch of shit. I've been hearing from several different sites with large readership that we should all burn a koran on the 4th of July and punking them motherfuckers out big time.
Allow me to express my views on this.........

I personally will not do this for a couple of reasons.
#1)  I can't find my copy of the koran that I bought from a used (remember the phrase used) bookstore just after 9/11. Maybe I tossed it, maybe my unclean wolfdog (muslims think dogs are unclean yet they'll fuck a goat - go figure) drug it out and buried it, maybe I used it for shitpaper when I ran low of my ultrasoft 4 ply asswipe.
Hell, maybe I used it to drain the grease off my bacon. But I honestly don't know where it is.
But I won't go out and buy a new one for this special occasion. Why not?

#2) Because I refuse to trade with any muslim owned business or any company that does business with muslims. I'll be damned if I'll put my dollars into their pockets. And believe me, if you buy a new koran from the bookstore to burn, you're sending your support and money to an islamic business. A used bookstore may be a different matter. That, I don't know.

My alternative?
Take your dog for a walk and let him piss on mosque property.
Go your local farmer and get pigs' blood, dry it and defile the property with it.
Scatter bacon (it's not wasting it, it's for a good cause) in their parking lot. Keep in mind it's probably guarded with video.
And my favorite - eat some greasy fucking bacon with your fingers, go to your bookseller and handle every fucking koran or hadith you can find. Then write the mosque (taking proper precautions) and let them know what you did - months later.

My point is this: Don't put your bucks into their pockets for something that won't make a difference unless it's a personal satisfaction deal, but even then, only buy from a used bookstore.
If you want to fuck with them, there's so many other different ways.
Have fun, Kids.


The Stig said...

this whole post was full of win

Ken...if you're ever in Missouri,
I'll buy you a beer and all the bacon you can eat

wirecutter said...

Yeah, KennyLane has been known to be sneaky, underhanded and ruthless.
Thanks for the offer of a beer. It means as much to me as a bought one.

Joshkie said...


Skip said...

Kenny For Pres.!

PatAZ said...

I think I will do the "eat bacon and touch all their Korans at Barnes and Noble". Will have to mark that date on my calendar.