Thursday, April 26, 2012

Hit 'em hard and fast

I know Krav Maga is a recognized fighting technigue but when I first saw it my only thought is "Shit, that's just good ol' street fighting - kicking, shoving, biting and gouging. I've been doing that all my life!" Well, yeah, it is street fighting but it's more than that. I'm not a student, so I can't tell you what all is involved but I've been able to pick out a few things about it like using balance to your advantage, pressure points, and hard, fast follow-up on every move. Never slow down or stop once the fight begins. And obviously lots of practice.

Pops always stressed that there is no such thing as a fair fight. Any fight that you are in for more than about 5 seconds is a fight you're for sure going to get hurt in and very possibly lose. His advice to me was to think, never lose your temper and find the biggest goddamned stick I could handle, but a rock will do in a pinch. Stay as far away from him as I can and hurt him. If I have to close with him, hit him with the heel of my hand. If I get pinned, bite something until I can taste blood, then bite harder. Gouge eyeballs, break eardrums, make that motherfucker cry like a little bitch.
Pretty heady advice for a third grader. Thank God I wasn't strong enough at that age to do any real damage.




The only thing I can think of that I would've done that he didn't was to break the elbow when he was standing over him with his opponent's arm straightened out. A quick kick and he's done.

I've noticed a few Krav Maga studios (or whatever the fuck you call them) around - might be worth looking into.
Naw, I'll probably break a hip or something. I'll just stick to shooting motherfuckers.

6 comments:

drjim said...

My Dad pretty much taught me the same thing. Hit them as hard as you can, as fast as you can, and keep doing it until they stop.
I've only had to do it twice, both times in grade school when I had no choice.
The first time was in second grade, when the schoolyard bully wouldn't leave me alone at recess. I complained to the Good Nuns (as my Mom called them), and they wouldn't do shit, as this kid's father was rich, and gave a lot of money to the church. He was quite a bit bigger than me, but I remembered what Dad told me, and gave him the biggest punch I could, and caught him right smack in his big mouth.
I busted his lip open, and this big tough bully ran away screaming like a little girl!
Never bothered me again.....

The other time was in 5th grade, when this one kid told me he was going to "get me" on the way home from school. Sure enough, the little bastard was hiding in some bushes about a block from my house, and jumped me when I walked by. He had me pinned on the ground laughing about how he was going to pound my teeth down my throat. Well, I got one arm loose, and grabbed a SHARP #2 pencil out of my nerd pack, and started slamming it into him as hard as I could. After about the fifth hit, he jumped off, and ran home screaming "MOMMY!".
He never bothered me again, either.
Thanks, Dad!

Tom Smith said...

Yeah few people attack from the front with a wide reaching hay maker. I worked in a grocery store and saw a fight end when the little guy hit "Mr Karate" with a wooden Coke crate. Done.

Quixote said...

Hey Wirecutter, years ago I heard my first 'ex' telling our fifth grader son to 'forgive & forget', walk or run away, never throw the first punch, Marquis of Queensbury rules, blah, blah, blah...I told him 'son (he was a good sized kid), you'll know at some point if there's going to be a fight - if there is going to be, you take steps to finish it fast or you lose - charge him, get him on the ground, and keep swingin' & bashing until someone pulls you off or he starts crying like a baby. Short fights save injuries, no time to nurse wounds son, there might be trouble around the corner...

BTW WC, that 'ex' remarried, a dentist!

Quixote

steve tompkins said...

guy talks like he has a mouth full of marbles.

Anonymous said...

Shoot'em
Too old for the jujitsu sh*t

Angrymike427 said...

Yep, pops taught me the same, only find the board fast, hit em till your tired. Now? Fuck it, that's why god taught man how to make guns, to shoot their ass.