Yeah, fuck man, I got over to the in law's house and almost cried when I saw that trailer. It was packed from top to bottom, nose to tail. I say packed..... it looked like it was loaded with a fucking front end loader. Light shit on the bottom, heavy shit up on top, everything shifted all over the place.
I had told Lisa the night before that we'd be done unloading the trailer by noon and I carried the last box out at 11:45.
Al had brought some of Lisa's furniture out here from Tennessee and it took 2 pickups to haul it over here. While Al was here, I went out to the backyard to get some pavers for him to cover some holes under his fence until he can rototil the backyard. The pavers were in a pile next to the Justice Shed and when I reached down to grab one I felt a sting on my finger. Fuck, I'm widder-bit. No shit, I pulled my hand up and there was the biggest black widow I've seen in a long time chewing on my finger.
Bitch. I shook it off and killed it, then went in to wash my hands and soak my finger in alcohol. Don't know if that does any good for the poison but it sounded like a good idea.
So now I'm sitting here waiting for my finger to turn black and blue and fall off. Actually, I hope it doesn't fall off, it was my bird finger and I can't drive without that finger, man. Feeling a little pukey, but I haven't been feeling that great for the past day or two anyways so I don't know if it's the bite or just not feeling well.
But it's been about an hour now and except for some swelling and some tingling, I'm all right. Fucking pussy spiders are overrated as hell. I figured it would at least hurt a little bit.
Well... It was nice having him back - while it lasted!
ReplyDeleteI have been bitten twice and I never thought the pain was that bad. The worst part was the ulcer that developed at the bite site the first time I waited a couple of weeks to go to the doctor, the last time about a week. I can learn but I must be slow. I still have the scar from the first one, the second scar has been covered up with new scars.
ReplyDeleteIf you have some Plantain growing around your yard, crush it up and apply with a compress to the bite site. You may also find it at your local health food type store. Echinacea, Lobelia and Burdock (internally) will also help. In a pinch you can apply a charcoal paste and also drink some of the charcoal in water......good luck
ReplyDeleteOr you can do what I suggested, Chicken.
ReplyDeleteI can't decide whether to offer a practical helpful comment or a completely inappropriate one.
ReplyDeleteFuck it, off to the races.
Out
Ouch ~hanging head in shame~ but you know I'm not really that kind of girl, right?
ReplyDeleteIn this area we have to look out for brown recluse spiders in the wood and rock piles as well as the house and office. Sharp bite and endless rotting unless drast treatment is administers. Leaves a very nasty scar. Hope your Widder bite doesn't do ya in!
ReplyDeleteC'mon, my wife got bit by a widow and didn't even realize it for two days. She just figured it was a random flu or something until she found the bite.
ReplyDeleteYou're not gonna die, although you'll probably want to for a day or so. And the whole finger-falling-off thing is more the territory of a brown recluse, so unless it gets infected, you won't lose your masterful ability at sign language. ;)
Just take it easy for the weekend. Get some rest, eat light and you'll be fine. (Then get some industrial strength insecticide and carpet-bomb the area.)
I don't know you and you don't know me, but for wirecutter to lose the use of his "bird finger" has to be a national emergency of the highest order.
ReplyDeleteGet well soon, young man. Best wishes.
Fuck, it's been several hours now and all I have is some tingling. Not even any swelling.
ReplyDeleteI'm kinda hoping it will ulcerate so I can have a nice scar like From Kansas.
Dude, it was nice knowing ya. I know your tough, start a journal and keep writing till you drop, that way the III will have not only something to remember you by, but we will know how widows affect ppl just before we need to get professional attention .......
ReplyDeletePshhh, a widow bite isn't bad at all. There is an antivenin but it's expensive as hell and you aren't going to need it, it's usually little ones and really old ones that have a hard time recovering. Flu for a couple of days. Congrats on getting the trailer unloaded on time!
ReplyDeletewhat was that the local atheist said all the time
ReplyDeleteoh yeah
NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED
wirecutter if ya really want a scar a dull knife does wonders ;)
in my neck o the woods we watch out for spiders ticks scorpions copperheads rattlers skunks pissed off coons coyoties wolves bears feral dogs feral hogs horny deer and elk and the ever elusive mountain lion
lots of things to kill ya or eat ya but i would rather spend the night naked in the woods than fully dressed in a city
damn that hairy fella looks like bigfoot he better leave my whiskey alone
hang tough wirecutter
To make sure you do not lose mobility in that finger keep the p.t. going. I recommend going to the liberal area around there and flexing it 8-10 times an hour.
ReplyDeleteDid Angel suggest soaking it in cider? Say it fast.
ReplyDeleteWell healed
ReplyDeleteWell said...... we got some snakes and always spiders, but that city's got many more things that can kill ya in a minute. What's old Hank say 'Country boys can survive'!!!!!!!
Just make sure to drink lots of clear liquids to keep your body in shape while you heal. Vodka and gin work especially well.
ReplyDeleteAnd then there's
ReplyDelete"That which doesn't kill you
Only makes you stronger."
After gettin' snake bit, I'm not stronger, but I am smarter! And supposedly I'm immune now.
Trust me, I aint gonna test that theory!
Good luck on the bite. It's the bacteria that get to be the problem, so keep the usual anti bacterial stuff in constant use for awhile.
The bite I had today was a Chinook salmon, but that's another story.
Professional help is long overdue, Angrymike. That spider was a day late and a dollar short.
ReplyDeleterpm you're a bad bad man :P
ReplyDeleteWirecutter, that spider didn't stand a chance. Pick at it, you might get a scar anyways ;-)
Brown recluse bite woulda put you down pronto. They're the bad-boys of the spider world.
ReplyDeleteBlack widow....Michelle Obama?
You fill in the blanks.
Never tried it but I heard if you take a cigar and get the cherry good and hot hen hit the bite wound with it. Suppose to kill off the poison.
ReplyDeleteI don't get it,rpm, I've googled cider for spider bites and I'm coming up with nothing. Is this a California thing?
ReplyDeleteAsk Miss K.
DeleteYou're gonna kil me when you get it.
hiswiseangel, Bwaaa, cold adult beverage all over the laptop, was that snark? If it wasn't, call me I'll clue you in.
ReplyDeleteWirecutter, don't sweat it, man. They will just amputate the arm when then need arrises. Thank your luck stars it wasn't a Brown recluse, they truely suck.
Snark?! Me?! Oh DT, perish the thought....
ReplyDeleterpm, you're on notice... :-P
RPM, She should kill you, you would deserve it at this point. You know everyone on this thread is laughing at that. However, thanks it was too funny.
ReplyDeleteI still can't believe that I beat the dynamic duo to the punch!
ReplyDeleteCue sound of celebratory beer being opened.
Ya' know wirecutter has got a grin bigger than the Cheshire Cat right now, hell, he's probably pointing at the screen with Mrs. Lisa over his shoulder laughing her ass off as well. This WAY TOO much fun.
ReplyDeleteWell, it was MY fault for allowing you gentlemen the false impression that I'm a slut instead of merely frisky and fun.
ReplyDeleteWe'll remedy that...rpm, ready for your punishment?
-snap|~~~~~~~~~~~ (|)
I heard Dickens Cider was the best...
ReplyDeleteAnd y'all are in the shit now.....
ReplyDeleteFun and Frisky you are Angel :-)
ReplyDeleteHand me that wipe, girl.
Seems a few of them boys need a lesson in respect.
Yeah, I'm French and proud of it...
ReplyDeleteWhip... not fucking wipe ~snicker~
Thanks MissK, just goes to show chivalry ain't dead, it's just dressing in drag...
ReplyDeleteDT and rpm, it's okay, laugh it up. Can't bitch about hurt feelings, I brought it on myself. But remember, a redhead NEVER forgets.....
Bwah-ha-ha-ha! Now where the hell did I put my Illudium Q-36 Space Modulator?