#10. When my youngest was about 4, he came to me and asked if he was adopted. After I'd told him no, I heard his sister say" see, we told you they wouldn't admit that you are adopted".
#3- back in my misspent youth in South Texas in the 70's a friend had a Dodge Charger that he had souped up in all the usual ways at a time when police departments were using some real weak cars. He deliberately went hauling ass up Bandera Highway through a small town that was a known speed trap, and just flat out-ran the cops when they started chasing him. So he TURNED AROUND TO GO BACK AND FIND THEM. He found them.
#7 I got to work one day and my bos said is something wrong you seem distracted. Nothing was wrong but I had remembered seeing a broom laying on the side of the interstate on my way to work,so I told him that I had thought that my ex-wife had had an accident. He asked my how I knew that. I told him I saw a broom just like the one she use to ride laying on the side of the road on my way to work.He went from concerned to laughing his ass off. Nothing was ever wrong. Hook,line and sinker.
#3 My ex's cousin was known as a trouble maker, up in my old Michigan town. He was out in the country once,with a couple of sheriff's cars chasing him, on all of the two tracks that are around our part of the state. He would get bored with that, and run into town, to our little tavern, have a beer, then go back out in the country and race around with the cops again. Finally, they stopped chasing him, and just went to his parents house,where he lived at the time, and waited for him to come home. He didn't do any jail time, but he lost his license and had to pay a fine and do a bunch of community service, which at that time was just becoming a thing.
I out ran a cop in 1994 on a country road. I was doing 125 mph and he was coming at us and we blew him off the road, I saw him go in the ditch turn around, hit the lights and I pushed the pedal all the way down, we drove to a friends house and hid it in the garage for a day or two. My friends in the car freaked and still bring that story up today.
I like #15's style.
ReplyDelete#16 I had to look. That really is the CS building.
ReplyDeleteChurch is real, but the water main story is fake.
Deletehttps://www.someecards.com/news/news/a-dk-shaped-church-had-a-water-main-break-right-in-the-tip/
In a hurry....were you......?
ReplyDeleteEd357
You fixed it.
DeleteEd357
I'd have fixed it earlier if you'd told me what I was in a hurry about. I didn't notice it until I was moderating another comment.
DeleteWhat can I say.
Sorry.....I guess I ended up being what I didn’t want to be....
DeleteI’ll try to be nicer in the future.
Ed357
#4 for the win.
ReplyDeleteDiffer
#10. When my youngest was about 4, he came to me and asked if he was adopted. After I'd told him no, I heard his sister say" see, we told you they wouldn't admit that you are adopted".
ReplyDeleteHoly crap #6 is real.
ReplyDeleteMadMarlin
#5
ReplyDelete#3- back in my misspent youth in South Texas in the 70's a friend had a Dodge Charger that he had souped up in all the usual ways at a time when police departments were using some real weak cars. He deliberately went hauling ass up Bandera Highway through a small town that was a known speed trap, and just flat out-ran the cops when they started chasing him. So he TURNED AROUND TO GO BACK AND FIND THEM. He found them.
ReplyDelete#7 I got to work one day and my bos said is something wrong you seem distracted. Nothing was wrong but I had remembered seeing a broom laying on the side of the interstate on my way to work,so I told him that I had thought that my ex-wife had had an accident. He asked my how I knew that. I told him I saw a broom just like the one she use to ride laying on the side of the road on my way to work.He went from concerned to laughing his ass off. Nothing was ever wrong. Hook,line and sinker.
ReplyDeleteThis may be your greatest set ever. Had me laughing and saying "oh, that's just wrong" time and again. Going to pick two (and it's hard!):
ReplyDelete#7 - Simple and an irony many men can appreciate.
#12 - More irony and it's just wrong.
#3 What if I did those things but now I wouldn't do them again?
ReplyDelete#3 My ex's cousin was known as a trouble maker, up in my old Michigan town. He was out in the country once,with a couple of sheriff's cars chasing him, on all of the two tracks that are around our part of the state. He would get bored with that, and run into town, to our little tavern, have a beer, then go back out in the country and race around with the cops again. Finally, they stopped chasing him, and just went to his parents house,where he lived at the time, and waited for him to come home.
ReplyDeleteHe didn't do any jail time, but he lost his license and had to pay a fine and do a bunch of community service, which at that time was just becoming a thing.
pigpen51
I out ran a cop in 1994 on a country road. I was doing 125 mph and he was coming at us and we blew him off the road, I saw him go in the ditch turn around, hit the lights and I pushed the pedal all the way down, we drove to a friends house and hid it in the garage for a day or two. My friends in the car freaked and still bring that story up today.
ReplyDelete