Tuesday, April 20, 2021

"Excuse me, can you break a million?"

APRIL 14--Two women sought to use a $1 million bill to purchase merchandise at a Dollar General store in Tennessee, police report. 

According to investigators, the duo appeared last Monday morning at the convenience store in Maryville, a Knoxville suburb. Their attempt to use the counterfeit bill was thwarted by a sentient Dollar General employee who called the cops.


  1. It would take a "senior DG employee" to realize it might be fake.

  2. Thought almost all Dollar General employees were sentient life forms, maybe some more than others. Good to know the reporter wanted to mention.

  3. Was that a bill with the signature of Pinocchio Joe?
    If so, that is valid currency.

  4. Who's picture is on a counterfeit million dollar bill? Joe Biden's?

  5. We lived in Maryville (my wife's home town) for several years. There are a couple of inbreds there. Also a bunch of Yankees and half-backs from Florida lured by too many "Great Place to Retire" articles. I miss it every day.

    1. Murr-ville, as we call it in East Tennessee.

  6. I've been through Maryville a few times taking my daughters to a summer camp. Kind of neat little town in a sort-of-flat part of the foothills of the Cumberland mountains.
    I really enjoyed the "*sentient* Dollar General employee" part. I assume a number of them are not?
    - Just A Chemist

  7. The very people who believe they are worth $15 a hour.

    De Oppresso Liber

  8. I knew Tennessee women were worse than Tulsa women.

  9. Interesting how time changes perspective on distance. One of my hobbies in genealogy and much of it takes place in Tennessee from about 1800 to 1880 or so, specifically in the areas south of Knoxville. Never once did I think of Maryville as a suburb of Knoxville because, of course, at horseback speeds, it wasn't. Apparently, the family didn't miss much by leaving for Texas.


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