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Tuesday, September 07, 2021

Badass of the Week: Joe Medicine Crow

"War Chief of the Crow Indians" isn't a title that's just randomly thrown around to any jackass who happens to own a gigantic, awesome-looking headdress and a really awesome traditional-style wooden bow made out of the bark of dead Treants. 

You don't become a War Chief just because you're the oldest dude in the tribe, or the most badass hunter, or the only guy in your zip code capable of bench-pressing an automobile. It's an ancient, prestigious honorific bestowed only upon the bravest, the strongest, and the most hardcore asskickers around, and the only way to attain this hallowed title is by proving yourself in combat and unlocking the four achievements the Crow believed to be the most insanely-difficult things a warrior can attempt in battle -- leading a successful war party on a raid, capturing an enemy's weapon, touching an enemy without killing him, and stealing an enemy's horse.
-WiscoDave