Three songs from my younger days I absolutely refuse to listen to now

Something a little different tonight: I usually post music that I listen to, groups I like, shit like that. Tonight it's 3 songs I won't listen to.

There's actually more than 3, but these are the top ones, and not in any particular order because I hate them equally, but for different reasons. You will notice however the common theme here is burnout.

Stairway To Heaven

This song became popular back when I was in high school and unfortunately at the same time small personal cassette players became the latest fad, so it was the Perfect Storm.

Every fucking teenage girl would go to school with their cassette player in their book bag with one just tape and that would be Led Zeppelin IV. It didn't matter of they were stoners, jockettes, 'tards, whatever, they all wore that song out. 

Our high school had a smoking area out front where different cliques hung out and during lunch you could have 16 different groups of girls hanging out within earshot and hear that fucking song coming from 16 different directions and none of them were in synch. Fuck man, even the black chicks were listening to that shit. Our two asian girls played it.

They'd play the song, rewind it, play it again. You could ask 10 different girls to name just one other song on that album and 9 of them would give you a blank stare.

Apparently Robert Plant feels the same way I do according to this short video, so I don't feel real bad.

The Real Reason Why Robert Plant Hates Stairway To Heaven

But yeah, we came back to the States in 1976 and moved to Georgia where Southern Rock had a firm foothold, so I was able to regain my sanity. The last time I listened to that song was in 1976 or '77 when the Led Zeppelin movie The Song Remains The Same came out. Me and a bunch of friends got tore up one night and went to see it in the theater. When that song came on, it was nauseating. Literally. I started feeling queasy as soon as I heard the first notes and thought at first maybe it was the sourmash or bourbon or rye or maybe even the beer, but as soon as the song ended I was fine.

I haven't risked it since.

Bohemian Rhapsody

Pretty much the same reason here too - it's not the only song on the goddamned album, bro. The only thing with this song is that it was popular with both the boys and girls so there was just no escaping this motherfucker.

Don't get me wrong, I dug Queen - early Queen, their first 5 albums. Sheer Heart Attack was their best album if you ask me and it was so good that we were all anxiously awaiting the release of A Night At The Opera because with their first 4 albums, they got progressively better. As good as Sheer Heart Attack was, this new one was bound to kick ass.

After it was released and the PX got it, they sold out within a couple hours. Not as impressive as it sounds as they probably only had a couple hundred albums, but still. One of my buddies snagged a copy on the German economy, so we ingested a goodly amount of LSD-25, fired up a couple bowls to kickstart the buzz and turned on the jams.

Not bad. Not great, but not bad. The one song that didn't impress me at all was Bohemian Rhapsody.  Not that it was a bad song, it just didn't do much for me. The rest of the album, well, we figured it would grow on us, and it did. 

But yeah, that first night we listened to it one time and then the acid started coming on like gangbusters so we put on some Pink Floyd and listened to that for the next 12 hours.

The rest of the world however, went nuts over Bohemian Rhapsody. Instant hit. It just exploded. I was hearing that song dozens of times a day. I'd go to the Teen Club to shoot some pool and it would be on the jukebox. It was on AFN constantly. I'd be walking down the street and a car driving by would be blasting it. I'd go to a friend's house and he'd be playing it. And of course all the cliques hanging out in front of the school played it constantly.

What sucks is I'm still hearing that fucking song. It's not nearly as bad as it was when it was released, but I bet I still hear it at least once a month.

But the last time I actually put Bohemian Rhapsody and sat down to listen to it? Honestly, I don't think I ever have, not even once. I've got the CD for my truck and whenever that song comes up, I just punch the Next Track button and drive on.

And while I did dig their first 5 albums, I just lost interest in any of their newer stuff.

Freebird

I know, I know, you're going 'Freebird?'

Freebird came out on their Pronounced album back in '73 or '74 and we were in Germany then and mostly into harder rock, so there wasn't a lot of exposure to it. Then we moved to Georgia in '76 and the only thing that was popular there was Southern Rock and Skynyrd was king.

Southern Rock just didn't do for me what it did for other people. I liked the music, but I liked Hendrix and Nugent and Deep Purple and Pink Floyd more. That didn't stop me from going down and getting tickets to see Lynyrd Skynyrd at the Columbus auditorium in May of '77, by far one of the most memorable concerts I've ever been to and I've got a couple hundred under my belt. Hell, I've been to over a hundred Grateful Dead shows alone and don't remember a shitload of those. 

Sadly, it was less than 5 months later their plane crashed, killing Ronnie Van Zant, Steve Gaines, and backup singer Cassie Gaines.

A couple years later, I'm in the army and had fallen in with a merry band of miscreants, drunkards and ne'er-do-wells. They were the mechanics for the company and to a man, all Southern white boys. These boys were so Southern that entering their barracks room, the first thing you notice is the battle flag on the wall - unless Hoagie was passed out on the floor in his drawers and in his own puke, you'd notice him first, of course.

There were framed pictures of Confederate generals Stuart, Jackson and Bragg on the minifridge and window sills. There was a fucking statue of Bob E. Lee mounted on his horse Traveller sitting on the cable reel that served as a coffee table. They even had an album of Confederate ballads and songs they played and sang along with on a fairly regular basis.

They also played Freebird on a regular basis, about 10 or 12 times a fucking night. For some ungodly reason they interpreted it as to getting out of the army, so it became the official 'I Wanna Go Home' song. I shouldn't have to remind you that these boys drank heavily.

And then some asshole decided that it would be a good idea to salute the battle flag when it came on. That shit got real old real quick. I mean once or twice is cool, but every time? Especially when they played an album, played Freebird, played an album, played Freebird... Fuck man, give me a break here.

So one night in a move so ballsy I am to this day amazed at its stupidity, I stood up and told them "Fuck that and fuck you, I ain't doing it no more". Looking back, I realize now I probably could've been a little more diplomatic in stating my position. At first they were shocked , then that very quickly turned to rage. They beat my ass, bro. They beat me up, they beat me down, they beat me all around. Fucking epic. After it was over with and I was laying in the cornering counting teeth and checking various appendages for free movement, they were in another corner glaring at me and muttering shit like damyankee and traitorous cocksucker and Californian. It was not looking good here. I figured they wore themselves out beating my ass so much they were only taking a breather, but between the asswhipping and alcohol responsible for it, I faded out. When I came to, I was in a chair with my right hand duct taped to my neck. I was told later they tried to tape it to my forehead in a mock salute, but they fucked it up and didn't have enough duck tape to redo it. Close enough for government work.

And then, when those bastards saw me stirring, they put on Freebird. Did I at least try to salute before the shooting pains in my arm and shoulder got too bad? You better fucking believe it, buddy. One asswhipping like that was bad enough, no way in hell I wanted two in the same night.

What really pissed me off was the very next weekend they all decided they weren't going to salute the flag when the song came on anymore either. They did however continue to play that fucking song 10-12 times a night.

So when was the last time I heard Freebird from start to finish? Well, I left active duty in July of 1981, so that would make it..... July of 1981. I've got a Greatest Hits CD for my truck and Freebird's on it. I hit the Next Track button every time. Painful memories.

BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

Fuck it, as long as I'm talking about shit I won't listen to, I would be remiss if I didn't mention that you'll never hear of me listening to anything the Rolling Stones put out. I cannot begin to tell you how much I detest the Stones. I don't know why I hate them so much, but I do.

I hate the Stones so much that if I'm in your truck and you put in a Stones CD, I'm ejecting it and frisbeeing it out the window. I'll pay you for it, but that one's history.

I hate the Stones so much I wouldn't even have considered dating a woman that liked them.

I hate the Stones so much I won't even listen to Aerosmith because Steven Tyler looks like Mick Jagger.

Hey, I like and respect the talents of every member (except Jagger, fuck that guy) of that group as individuals, but when they come together, they lose me.

The common denominator here is Mick Jagger. I'm not even going to get started on what I thing about that prissy, thick lipped, scrawny little bitch.