Not enough people understand #17. #3, For almost 10 years now, I've been looking at dozens to hundreds of cows every time I leave my drive way...so, there's that. They smell fine, I still like them.
#12 and #16: I have not laughed so hard in a long time (especially 12).
#17: I open a lot of bags of animal feed. Make sure the top of the bag is up. Face the bag where the thread is a single strand (not the braided side). Pinch the right-most loop of thread between your thumb nail and a finger. Pull gently. Works every time I have used this technique and on every manufacturer I have come in contact with.
Pennington 40 lb. black oil sunflower seed. No such luck. I figure the birds in the warehouse probably figured out the easy-open thread system, so they now sew the bags tighter than those mini-britches on a late-night Walmart ho'.
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Numbers 3 and 17: Both stone cold facts.
ReplyDeleteYou are my kind of people!
DeleteBrenda
Okay ladies, calm down.
DeleteSame
Deleteface the stitches, start on the left,...dumbass. that is how I was taught to open a feed bag
DeleteNot enough people understand #17.
Delete#3, For almost 10 years now, I've been looking at dozens to hundreds of cows every time I leave my drive way...so, there's that. They smell fine, I still like them.
I had to share some of these with friends before I even read them all. Good ones still laughing and thanks
ReplyDelete#13: With the correct haircut, it will be the Karen Barbie.
ReplyDelete#14 is the perfect meme for the FBI's approval to use deadly force during the Mar A Lago raid.
ReplyDeleteJpaul
Damn so funny and so true
ReplyDelete#12 and #16: I have not laughed so hard in a long time (especially 12).
ReplyDelete#17: I open a lot of bags of animal feed. Make sure the top of the bag is up. Face the bag where the thread is a single strand (not the braided side). Pinch the right-most loop of thread between your thumb nail and a finger. Pull gently. Works every time I have used this technique and on every manufacturer I have come in contact with.
#17 Feed sacks are junior level.
DeleteWhen you can pull the string on a 50# sack of fescue seed, you have graduated.
Pennington 40 lb. black oil sunflower seed. No such luck. I figure the birds in the warehouse probably figured out the easy-open thread system, so they now sew the bags tighter than those mini-britches on a late-night Walmart ho'.
Delete#9 It gots to have at least two capital letters and an apostrophe.
ReplyDelete