I've raised Box turtles for 50yrs & never thought to try & kiss one. Good way to get botulism, salmonella & a few other things you don't want. And turtles ain't a real good pet anyway.
Yep. I have dodgy knees from crashing motorbikes as a youth and that hurts. Only had people do it twice since and both got the message that it was unacceptable to do that.
#1: Imagine trying this with a snapper. She wouldn't be pretty after that. You just know it's coming to TikTok some day soon. #2: I'm so paranoid about stuff like this happening that if I'm ever putting something down in a public place it's either between my legs or on my foot. It's not moving without me knowing. #4: I'm surprised there's any manual component at all to that. #5: "Did you just boop me? I'LL KILL YOU FUCKER!!!" #6: Not sure when it happened, but I'm at a point in my life now where I don't find this remotely funny. I'd be in a "cut your brake line" mood over this. #8: My dad had an industrial sowing machine that he used for upholstery mainly, I saw plenty of those in my youth. He would have blown his lid seeing this. #10: My brother has a 120 pound (and growing) dog. His prey drive is nonexistent, but when he sees another dog I swear he could damn near outpull an ox.
5) Before I would even touch that little bastard I would make sure momma was going to the taxidermist to become a nice hat. Don't want to deal with a pissed off raccoon.
I don't know much about boats, but I do know that when you're under power in heavy seas, part of the job is to adjust the speed so the boat will be "on step", hitting the wave peaks at just the right frequency to minimize the fore-and-aft pitching.
#9 Clearly, she wasn't Haitian...
ReplyDeleteAmbush ahead..
Delete#2 - That is a good reason for me to have an over the shoulder sling for my bag or briefcase while traveling.
ReplyDelete#9 - Henry J. Henhouse III, aka "Super Chicken" from the "George of the Jungle" cartoon show.
ReplyDelete"You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred."
Delete#1 - I had a 10" long Red Eared Slider in my turtle collection when I was a kid. That bastard would bite. Every time he got a chance.
ReplyDeleteI've raised Box turtles for 50yrs & never thought to try & kiss one. Good way to get botulism, salmonella & a few other things you don't want. And turtles ain't a real good pet anyway.
Delete#6 is just cause for a massive ass whoopin'. Later. When the guy is sober. But, ass whoopin' nonetheless!
ReplyDelete#6 - "And that's how the fight started ..."
DeleteYep. I have dodgy knees from crashing motorbikes as a youth and that hurts. Only had people do it twice since and both got the message that it was unacceptable to do that.
Delete#3. The reason I was a soldier instead of a sailor. Heard enough stories about storms at sea from my uncle to convince me I wanted no part in it
ReplyDelete#3 was a scene from the TV series Deadliest Catch, and specifically of the F/V Northwestern out somewhere on the Bering Sea.
DeleteNot the Northwestern. Northwestern is white with blue trim. That looks like a North Sea oil platform service ship.
DeleteThat ain't the Northwestern, and it is fitted out as net trawler, not a crab boat.
Delete#1 Ended to soon. Morons. Gotta loves me one videoing themself's
ReplyDelete#3 Barfing up stuff I ate 7 years ago
Backwoods Okie
#9 - She didn't think he was watching yesterday when she came home with that 3 piece meal.
ReplyDelete#1 ... Duck face meets turtle lips.
ReplyDelete#8, when bae pulls down her spandex pants.
ReplyDelete- WDS
#1: Imagine trying this with a snapper. She wouldn't be pretty after that. You just know it's coming to TikTok some day soon.
ReplyDelete#2: I'm so paranoid about stuff like this happening that if I'm ever putting something down in a public place it's either between my legs or on my foot. It's not moving without me knowing.
#4: I'm surprised there's any manual component at all to that.
#5: "Did you just boop me? I'LL KILL YOU FUCKER!!!"
#6: Not sure when it happened, but I'm at a point in my life now where I don't find this remotely funny. I'd be in a "cut your brake line" mood over this.
#8: My dad had an industrial sowing machine that he used for upholstery mainly, I saw plenty of those in my youth. He would have blown his lid seeing this.
#10: My brother has a 120 pound (and growing) dog. His prey drive is nonexistent, but when he sees another dog I swear he could damn near outpull an ox.
5) Before I would even touch that little bastard I would make sure momma was going to the taxidermist to become a nice hat.
ReplyDeleteDon't want to deal with a pissed off raccoon.
Always wondered what Wisco Dave looked like
DeleteDoesn’t look like a gal scared of a big black cock.
ReplyDelete#3 is likely how the Edmund Fitzgerald went under and sank.
ReplyDelete#8 like taking the Lulu Lemons off a fat chick.
I don't know much about boats, but I do know that when you're under power in heavy seas, part of the job is to adjust the speed so the boat will be "on step", hitting the wave peaks at just the right frequency to minimize the fore-and-aft pitching.
Delete'Course, you can't be on step all the time...