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Thursday, October 17, 2024

Anything for a buck

CHICAGO — You’ve heard the phrase, “People will steal anything that’s not nailed down.” As insatiable consumers of Chicago police report narratives, we can confirm the phrase is true. 

Exhibit A: William Garner. He’s accused of stealing brass fittings from urinals at the University of Chicago and causing significant damage by releasing torrents of water from the compromised pipes.
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7 comments:

  1. -- You’ve heard the phrase, “People will steal anything that’s not nailed down.” --

    And if you nail it down, they'll steal the nails as well.

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  2. Heard my dad comment about a larcenous friend of his "Bud would steal Jesus off the cross, then come back for the nails"

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  3. A 60 year old black man wandering around the halls of a university campus building was not enough to arouse suspicion before the crimes were committed?

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    Replies
    1. It's a freaking Commie, progressive infested institution, Anon. They'll say the Baboon was justified since his ancestors were slaves and the brass fittings were "reparations".

      Delete
  4. This guy is 60 years old, and he's still doing punk shit like this ?

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  5. Saw a story on the Lost-Angeles teevee news last night covering gangs that drain the oil from big industrial transformers to make them inoperable, then cut the copper from inside and sell it as scrap. Same problem is happening with city utilities.

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  6. Beat him to death with a pipe wrench.

    ReplyDelete

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