Saturday, September 19, 2009

My future second ex-wife

Always loved them German ladies.......

Gotta be California (again)

I need this for a welcome mat


Either one is not good.....


From my new best friend Rick!

CAMEL TOE!!!!!!!!

Backwards is gooooood!

Thanks to MWH for sending me a couple of camel toe links.

O Shit!

Here's a statement that we'll be seeing a lot more of as time goes on...
-Tattoo Jim

I shoulda been more specific....

I'm always willing to help a fellow blogger out.
Dog, gun and camel toe - all in one photo, as requested.
Let me know if you need a frame.

Okay, a few days ago I asked you nice folks for material for my blog, especially pictures of guns, dogs and camel toes. I also said that anybody sent all three in one photo, I'd give 'em a special mention.
I shoulda known.......
Deb from gets the first and only (so far) special mention and a plug for her blog -not that she needs one.
For great humor and a wonderful series on her home state, check out her blog.

Well, isn't that precious?

Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX airport.
The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man. The second was a well mannered elderly woman from the South. When the conversation centered on whether they had any children, the California woman started by saying, "When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me."
The lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz".
Again, the lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman continued boasting, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.
Again, the Southern lady commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
"My husband sent me to charm school," declared the Southern lady.
"Charm school?" the first woman cried, "Oh, my God! What on earth for?"
The Southern lady responded, "Well, for example, instead of saying "Who gives a shit?" I learned to say, "Well, isn't that precious..."

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Hit the archives (better known as "Old Shit"), folks

Okay, I had a bunch of shit that I was going to post tonight but my laptop is fucking up so bad that I'm about ready to heave the motherfucker through my TV set.
It's opening programs at random, taking forever to access the folders where all my pictures are, and generally being a pain in the ass.
With my fucking firewalls and virus programs, I find it hard to believe that it got an STD (whatever happened to VD????).
So, before I do something I'll regret and can't afford to do, I'm shutting it down and drinking beer.
What really pisses me off is that Deb ( sent me a picture of a dog, a gun and a camel toe that I wanted to post.
Check back tomorrow.

Thanks, Yolo. I blew beer out of my nose.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Understanding Women???

I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.


You know what? While I will be the first to admit that US Representative's comments shouldn't have been made where they were, I will say this - FUCK YOU JIMMY.
I am so goddamned tired of that fucking race card being played - anytime you dare to disagree with that Socialist-Fascist-Communist Cocksucker, you're automatically branded a Racist.
Well, if disagreeing with anything and everything that Obama says brands you a Racist, then I'm proud to be one.
But I prefer to be called a Patriot. Or even better, an American.

By GREG BLUESTEIN, Associated Press Writer Greg Bluestein, Associated Press Writer
– Former President Jimmy Carter said Tuesday that U.S. Rep. Joe Wilson's outburst to President Barack Obama during a speech to Congress last week was an act "based on racism" and rooted in fears of a black president.
"I think it's based on racism," Carter said in response to an audience question at a town hall held at his presidential center in Atlanta. "There is an inherent feeling among many in this country that an African-American should not be president."
The Georgia Democrat said the outburst was a part of a disturbing trend directed at the president that has included demonstrators equating Obama to Nazi leaders.
"Those kind of things are not just casual outcomes of a sincere debate on whether we should have a national program on health care," he said. "It's deeper than that."
Wilson, a South Carolina Republican, was formally rebuked Tuesday in a House vote for shouting "You lie!" during Obama's speech to Congress last Wednesday.
The shout came after the president commented that illegal aliens would be ineligible for federal subsidies to buy health insurance. Republicans expressed their disbelief with sounds of disapproval, punctuated by Wilson's outburst.
Tuesday's rebuke was a rare resolution of disapproval pushed through by Democrats who insisted that Wilson had violated basic rules of decorum and civility. Republicans characterized the measure as a witch hunt and Wilson, who had already apologized to Obama, insisted he owed the House no apology.
Wilson's spokesman was not immediately available for comment, but his eldest son defended his father.
"There is not a racist bone in my dad's body," said Alan Wilson, an Iraq veteran who is running for state attorney general. "He doesn't even laugh at distasteful jokes. I won't comment on former President Carter, because I don't know President Carter. But I know my dad, and it's just not in him."
"It's unfortunate people make that jump. People can disagree — and appropriately disagree — on issues of substance, but when they make the jump to race it's absolutely ludicrous. My brothers and I were raised by our parents to respect everyone regardless of background or race."
South Carolina's former Democratic Party chairman said that he doesn't believe Wilson was motivated by racism, but said the outburst encouraged racist views.
"I think Joe's conduct was asinine, but I think it would be asinine no matter what the color of the president," said Dick Harpootlian, who has known Wilson for decades. "I don't think Joe's outburst was caused by President Obama being African-American. I think it was caused by no filter being between his brain and his mouth."
Harpootlian said he received scores of racial e-mails from outside South Carolina after he talked about the vote on Fox News.
"You have a bunch of folks out there looking for some comfort in their racial issues. They have a problem with an African-American president," he said. "But was he motivated by that? I don't think so. I respectfully disagree with President Carter, though it gives validity to racism."
Carter called Wilson's comment "dastardly" and an aftershock of racist views that have permeated American politics for decades.
"The president is not only the head of government, he is the head of state," he said. "And no matter who he is or how much we disagree with his policies, the president should be treated with respect."

Sock? What sock? Dude? What dude?

Thanks, Phil


Yo Ken: I'm no expert, but reading the Presidential Lips the other night, this principle came thru loud & clear...........

No words needed

Even the Japanese know a good thing... hamburgers, Coca-Cola, big boobs and a gun on the hip... America, Fuck Yeah!
Tattoo Jim

People of WalMart

Let’s run through my rock star list….Mullet? – check; big sunglasses? – check; heart shaped tattoo? – u know i love my mom; Cut jean shorts? – are there any other type of shorts?; wife beater tied at the midriff – check;….. He is an official ROCK STAR!
Woody sent me a bunch of these pictures tonight. I'll run 'em one at a time to keep y'all entertained.

Well, there goes my budget......

I found this place, and somehow you came to mind.
Bacon salt, mayonnaise, lip balm, sunflower seeds.

More fan mail, dammit

I just wanted to drop you a line to say "hi".
I read your blog EVERY day (sometimes I check it 2 or 3 times a day). You are number one on my blog list!
I am so sorry that you live in Kalifornia! I will stop wishing it falls into the ocean for your sake.
Ok words are escaping me at this point. Bottom line is YOU ROCK!!!!!!!

If you are ever in central Pennsylvania- let me know, we can go shooting, have a cigar and an O'douls(I do not drink any more- had more than my share before).

I am attaching a pic of my dog. She is truly the love of my life. Her name is actually Mossberg.
Peace from Bedford, PA

Okay, one sure way to get a letter published on this site is to send a picture of your dog with a gun in the background.
And keep wishing for that miracle, Brother. I live 90 miles inland and there's a couple of small mountain ranges between me and the coast. Besides, I would gladly sacrifice myself for the good of our Country.
Mossberg? Really? How cool!