One, it aint ripe. Two no fuggin way. Pineapple sharp as shit on the outside. Plus make sure you get all the little specks of out of the pineapple when ya peel it with a knife. Those lil specks tear your throat up as in itching.
Pineapple originated in S. America. Indigenous pineapple eaters didn't do that stuff because they did not have concrete to roll the thing around on, but they did have sharp-ass knives.
My Filipino Platoon Sgt. used to grab a pineapple by the leaves, chop it off at ground level with his machete and use the blade to clean the thing with four swipes. He'd hand 'em to us guys and we'd snack as we slogged through the paddies. That guy knew every kind of fruit that grew in Viet of the Nam. Stuff was a nice break from C-rats. He also took it personally when I stepped on a booby trap, as though he could watch out for all his troops, all the time. Thanks, Sgt. Trambuco.
who the hell eats pineapple anyway
ReplyDeleteI do. I particularly like the core. I chew it like a chaw of tobacco. A pleasant sensation for a reformed nicotine addict.
DeleteWork???
ReplyDeleteEasy-peasy:
Hand the pineapple to someone else.
Have the someone else take care of it.
One, it aint ripe. Two no fuggin way. Pineapple sharp as shit on the outside. Plus make sure you get all the little specks of out of the pineapple when ya peel it with a knife. Those lil specks tear your throat up as in itching.
ReplyDeleteAlright, already bite sized for my pizza! Thanks, Kenny!
ReplyDeleteMan up buddy. What the fuck are you wearing? Yoga pants? some kind of douche shoes? Watching a man kneel like that just hurts my soul.
ReplyDeleteOr you could use a knife and be done in under 30 seconds, without having to crawl around on the floor.
ReplyDeletePineapple originated in S. America. Indigenous pineapple eaters didn't do that stuff because they did not have concrete to roll the thing around on, but they did have sharp-ass knives.
ReplyDeleteMy Filipino Platoon Sgt. used to grab a pineapple by the leaves, chop it off at ground level with his machete and use the blade to clean the thing with four swipes. He'd hand 'em to us guys and we'd snack as we slogged through the paddies.
ReplyDeleteThat guy knew every kind of fruit that grew in Viet of the Nam. Stuff was a nice break from C-rats.
He also took it personally when I stepped on a booby trap, as though he could watch out for all his troops, all the time. Thanks, Sgt. Trambuco.
Inbred Redneck