"Madame Butterfly's Massage Parlor. How may we service you"
Immediate disconnect.
No big deal, right. But the funny part is that this was on deployment in theater for Desert Shield/Storm. The calls were on a crypto phone on a closed, dedicated military net, not the public switched telephone network. USCENTAF in Saudi Arabia was calling.
#7, nearly spit my beer. Is that an OJT benefit? #10, Me. Every morning at 6AM. Worse if I've been 'celebrating'. #17, oh yeah. There'd be fuckery with it for sure. #19, I could use a pro level roll some mornings. I'll wait for the tactical version.
Place I used to work was the state point for the National Defense line, which didn't ring but was on a speaker. One day the phone company got two lines crossed, and on came two guys talking about last Saturday night, including describing boobs, how hot she was, and other activities. The superviser in DC was about to have a stroke: "Who is on the circuit? WHO IS ON THE CIRCUIT?" His condition was not helped when the reply started with "Who the fuck are YOU?"
#13 - when I get a spam call and there's someone from some third world shithole allegedly calling about my student loan (which I've never had) or my car warranty (laugh), I usually try to waste as much of their time as possible before going into my x rated rant. I try to do my little part wasting their time so they don't scam someone else. I'll have to start answering like #13 or some of the other suggestions on here as a variation!
#7 got me smiling, #18 got me laughing and the truth in #20 got me crying
ReplyDelete
ReplyDelete#2 needs ABS
#20 The new IRS agents....
ReplyDeletenot just the new ones
DeleteI copied #17. Love it.
Delete#18 She'll suffer for a couple of hours. He'll suffer for that one for the rest of his life.
ReplyDelete#13 - True story: Slow day. The phone rang, and I answered it.
ReplyDelete"Pizza Shack. Can I take your order?"
"Wha... " Caller sputtering, hangs up. Phone rings again.
"Madame Butterfly's Massage Parlor. How may we service you"
Immediate disconnect.
No big deal, right. But the funny part is that this was on deployment in theater for Desert Shield/Storm. The calls were on a crypto phone on a closed, dedicated military net, not the public switched telephone network. USCENTAF in Saudi Arabia was calling.
Ha!
DeleteHa!Ha!
Ha!Ha!Ha!
I love it!!
I hope you did the second one with a thick Asian accent. What a howl!
Thanks for the laugh. I really needed a laugh today.
"Dick's Bordello and Travel. Whether you're coming or going, we gotcha covered."
ReplyDeleteJoe's funeral home. You stab em, we slab em.
DeleteJoe's Abortion Clinic:
DeleteYou rape 'em.
We scrape 'em!
No fetus can beat us!
#7, nearly spit my beer. Is that an OJT benefit?
ReplyDelete#10, Me. Every morning at 6AM. Worse if I've been 'celebrating'.
#17, oh yeah. There'd be fuckery with it for sure.
#19, I could use a pro level roll some mornings. I'll wait for the tactical version.
Place I used to work was the state point for the National Defense line, which didn't ring but was on a speaker.
ReplyDeleteOne day the phone company got two lines crossed, and on came two guys talking about last Saturday night, including describing boobs, how hot she was, and other activities.
The superviser in DC was about to have a stroke: "Who is on the circuit? WHO IS ON THE CIRCUIT?" His condition was not helped when the reply started with "Who the fuck are YOU?"
#7 Is that one of them Arabian Setters I've heard about?
ReplyDelete#7: The dog misunderstood his job description.
ReplyDelete#7 Muslim dog???????
ReplyDeleteUnder Islam: If dogs are unclean and screw a sheep does that mean the sheep is still a virgin?
Delete#13 - when I get a spam call and there's someone from some third world shithole allegedly calling about my student loan (which I've never had) or my car warranty (laugh), I usually try to waste as much of their time as possible before going into my x rated rant. I try to do my little part wasting their time so they don't scam someone else. I'll have to start answering like #13 or some of the other suggestions on here as a variation!
ReplyDelete#1 is funny the first time. And the second time, but not the third time.
ReplyDelete#5 looks like Schiff is taking pictures now.
ReplyDelete3, much love and prayers to them.
ReplyDelete