#13 - Someone gave me a little tool set for my second birthday. It wasn't one of the plastic toy sets, they were real tools. I started taking the knobs off of the doors. I had a couple off before they caught me.
I find that Jim Beam 1.75 L are the perfect size for Iced Tea....especially when working a work party at the range or otherwise doing some volunteer work in public....
#4 I always thought that you just turned the radio up. Of course, back then it was actually the 8 track player. We bought a new van in February, and we still don't know how to set the radio up. I printed it out, but just leave it on one station. It shows you can use CD's, plug in your cell phone for music, and use an SD card to play what you want. Too much damn work for me. I hate having to drive out to places anyway, but I won't let my wife go alone, not with the world the way it is today. She doesn't like guns, so I have to make sure that there is at least one gun onboard in case of emergency. If I thought I could get away with it, I would rig up 4 claymore mines on each side, hooked to a 4 way switch inside, for occupant safety.
13 - Could be worse. I once gave a two year-old a power screwdriver as a birthday present.
ReplyDelete#4: And tape over the engine warning light too.
ReplyDelete#6: Like squeezing an almost empty toothpaste tube.
#8: If they're frozen real hard you'll get a ricochet.
#11: I use empty & clean empty Clorox bleach bottles myself.
#20: There's a lot of truth in that especially if the recruit is explaining it to his parole officer.
#4: Either that, or turn up the radio...
ReplyDelete#11: "My empty liquor bottles" indicates you actually DID empty them of liquor...
#20: UMMM... The Coast Guard didn't want him either...
#16- my wife has 128 commandments on the proper way to put milk in the 'fridge alone...
ReplyDelete#8: LOL'ed. Reminds me of the .22 LRHP and how many marshmallow Easter Chicks would it penetrate.
ReplyDeleteEd
Memes a modern day way to make us laugh and wonder what the hell the world is coming to
ReplyDelete#20. How do you give a Marine a bloody nose? Throw sand at a wall and yell " hit the beach!"
ReplyDelete#8. Now ask yourself, how many giant tootsie rolls does it take to stop a .500 magnum ?
ReplyDeleteJust one if you stuff it tightly into the barrel.
DeleteNot only no, but my neighbor's cow will be giving chocolate milk for the foreseeable future.
Delete#13 - Someone gave me a little tool set for my second birthday. It wasn't one of the plastic toy sets, they were real tools. I started taking the knobs off of the doors. I had a couple off before they caught me.
ReplyDeleteMy oldest son, at about that age, borrowed several of my wrenches and proceeded to dismantle the dining room table.
DeleteI find that Jim Beam 1.75 L are the perfect size for Iced Tea....especially when working a work party at the range or otherwise doing some volunteer work in public....
ReplyDeleteAll are great but # 1 will always be true
ReplyDeleteJD
Of course, because it's TRUE!
DeleteActually, Big Mike has one Barry is one...
DeleteGood stuff, I needed a laugh today
ReplyDelete#4 I always thought that you just turned the radio up. Of course, back then it was actually the 8 track player.
ReplyDeleteWe bought a new van in February, and we still don't know how to set the radio up. I printed it out, but just leave it on one station. It shows you can use CD's, plug in your cell phone for music, and use an SD card to play what you want. Too much damn work for me. I hate having to drive out to places anyway, but I won't let my wife go alone, not with the world the way it is today. She doesn't like guns, so I have to make sure that there is at least one gun onboard in case of emergency.
If I thought I could get away with it, I would rig up 4 claymore mines on each side, hooked to a 4 way switch inside, for occupant safety.
Design a system to hold eight shotgun shells under the running boards with remote firing. Much easier on the paint job.
Delete#11 The neighbors are guessing whether are pregnant or just putting on more weight.
ReplyDelete