Saturday, April 25, 2009

Taxation with faux representation


Yeah, somebody is watching... with greedy little eyes. Fuckers.
Tattoo Jim

Friday, April 24, 2009

Gotta Be California (again)


-Tattoo Jim

World's funniest voice mail

This shit is funnier than hell. I listened to it a half dozen times and laughed just as hard the last time as I did the first.

http://www.canucklehead.ca/blog/funny_voicemail.html

Thanks to Tattoo Jim

Bacon is b-a-d.....

Industrial Accidents
American businesses are always looking for ways to sustain and increase profits. Workers who use bacon cut into these profits. According to a leading medical journal, bacon users had 55% more industrial accidents than non-users.

Injuries
Injuries cost businesses money through increased workers' compensation claims and insurance costs. One study found that bacon users had 85% more injuries at work than non-users. When safety comes first, ensuring that workers do not use bacon is an important step.

Absenteeism
In order for businesses to work, employees must show up to work. Bacon users have been shown to have a 78% increase in absenteeism over non-users. Absent workers mean lower productivity.

Disciplinary Problems
In the same study, workers who tested positive for bacon use had disciplinary problems at work 64% more often than workers who tested negative for bacon.

Cognitive Skills
Bacon decreases motor skills, concentration and coordination. Accidents may result from a distortion of time and space relationships. Users may experience shifting sensory imagery, impaired memory, and a dulling of attention despite an illusion of heightened insight. Occasionally, an altered sense of self-identity and paranoia are reported.

Transportation
The highways, railways, air routes and waterways of America are a vital part of the business infrastructure. They can also be dangerous. Businesses with bacon-impaired operators take a greater chance of causing injury to themselves, their shipments, and the traveling public. Accident records from one study showed that up to 12% of non-fatally injured drivers and up to 16% of fatally injured drivers had bacon in their stomachs.

Job Performance
The behavior of bacon-eating employees is associated with negative attitudes toward work and job performance. Surveys have found that bacon users were less likely to commit to the organization, had lower job satisfaction, and had higher job turnover rates. The data indicates that bacon use is strongly associated with poor workplace performance. The bottom line is that bacon users do not make good employees!


So? What's your point?
-Tattoo Jim

Gotta get one


-Yolo

Oh yeah


White Boys can't dance


Looks like you're right, Andy

Oh well, what can we say?

The State of Sonora is angry at Influx of Mexicans into Mexico. Nine state legislators from the Mexican state of Sonora traveled to Tucson to complain about Arizona 's new employer crackdown on illegal’s from Mexico... It seems that many Mexican illegals are now returning to their hometowns and the officials in the Sonora state government are ticked off about it.

A delegation of nine state legislators from Sonora was in Tucson on Tuesday to say Arizona 's new employer sanctions law will have a devastating effect on the Mexican state.

At a news conference, the legislators said Sonora - Arizona 's southern neighbor, made up of mostly small towns - cannot handle the demand for housing, jobs and schools it will face as illegal Mexican workers here return to their hometowns without jobs or money. The law, which took effect Jan.1, punishes employers who knowingly hire individuals who don't have valid legal documents to work in the United States. Penalties include suspension of, or loss of, their business license.

The Mexican legislators are angry because their own citizens are returning to their hometowns, placing a burden on their state government. 'How can they pass a law like this?' asked Mexican Rep. Leticia Amparano-Gamez, who represents Nogales.

'There is not one person living in Sonora who does not have a friend or relative working in Arizona,' she said, speaking only in Spanish. 'Mexico is not prepared for this, for the tremendous problems it will face as more and more Mexicans working in Arizona and sending money to their families return to hometowns in Sonora without jobs,' she said.

'We are one family, socially and economically,' she said of the people of Sonora and Arizona... Wrong!

The United States is a sovereign nation, not a subsidiary of Mexico , and its taxpayers are not responsible for the welfare of Mexico 's citizens.

It's time for the Mexican government, and its citizens, to stop parasitically feeding off of the United States and to start taking care of their own needs.

Too bad all the US states don't pass a law just like Sonora. Maybe that's the answer, since our own Congress will not do anything!

New Immigration Laws:
Read to the bottom or you will miss the message...
1. There will be no special bilingual programs in the schools.
2. All ballots will be in this nation's language.
3. All government business will be conducted in our language.
4. Non-residents will NOT have the right to vote no matter how long they are here.
5. Non-citizens will NEVER be able to hold political office
6. Foreigners will not be a burden to the taxpayers. No welfare, no food stamps, no health care, or other government assistance programs. Any burden will be deported.
7. Foreigners can invest in this country, but it must be an amount at least equal to 40,000 times the daily minimum wage.
8. If foreigners come here and buy land... options will be restricted. Certain parcels including waterfront property are reserved for citizens naturally born into this country.
9. Foreigners may have no protests; no demonstrations, no waving of a foreign flag, no political organizing, no bad-mouthing our president or his policies. These will lead to deportation.
10. If you do come to this country illegally, you will be actively hunted and, when caught, sent to jail until your deportation can be arranged. All assets will be taken from you.
Too strict?
The above laws are current immigration laws of MEXICO!!!

Not that I'm complaining, but why did this hottie even bother getting dressed?


The Gathering - 1883


Click to enlarge.
This photo is in dispute by experts but is still pretty damn cool.

He's Baaaaack!


-Yolo

My favorite song!!!


-Yolo

Cappin' on Obama

Q. What do Obama and Osama have in common?
A. They both have friends who bombed the Pentagon.

Q. Why wouldn’t Barack salute the American flag?
A. It was ours.

Q. Why did Barack Obama register to run for office as a Democrat?
A. The Communist Party doesn’t have enough voters.

Q. Why does Barack Obama oppose the Second Amendment?
A. It stands between him and the First.

Q. Why won’t Barack Obama’s presidential jet be flight worthy?
A. It will only have a left wing.

Another blog I like

A no-bullshit blogger that ain't afraid to say what he thinks.
"Soylent Green"
http://cbullitt.wordpress.com/

And I thought I was ugly....



This is a Mole Rat, native to Africa.
If you are having a bad day and feeling sorry for yourself, remember:
Things could be worse, you COULD look like a dick with buck teeth.

I don't like squash either.....

What do spinach and anal sex have in common? If it was forced on you as a kid, you probably won’t like it as an adult.

Nancy, Nancy, Nancy....

Two blonde girls walk into a department store. They walk up to the perfume counter and pick up a sample bottle. Nancy sprays it on her wrist and smells it, "That's quite nice, don't you think, Kathy?"
Kathy takes a sniff and replies, "That is nice. What's it called?"
"Viens a moi," replies Nancy.
"Viens a moi? What the heck does that mean?"
At this stage the store clerk offers some help. "Viens a moi, ladies, means 'come to me' in French."
Nancy takes another sniff, then offers her arm to Kathy again, and remarks, "That doesn't smell like cum to me. Does that smell like cum to you?"

How cool is this?


Buttons - gotta love 'em


Fucking Okies, I swear....

Oklahoma's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery.
Search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

It just ain't blondes ....


These contractors are installing the steel pillars in concrete to stop vehicles from parking on the pavement outside a Sports Bar downtown. They are now in the process of cleaning up at the end of the day and anxious to go home.
How long until they realize where they parked?
Thanks, Dan Dan the Truck Drivin' Man

Monday, April 20, 2009

He lives!!!!

Finally heard from Tattoo Jim, posting the email I got from him a bit ago.


Hey Ken,
Didn't mean to worry anyone. I'm away from the OBX for a while visiting family. I've just been checking email every once in a while but haven't hit the blogs for a few days ( quite a few I guess). The traveling was rough and I haven't seemed to be able to re-coup from it. Thanks for checking... I appreciate it. I'll be heading back in a couple of days so, hopefully, I'll be checking things out again.Take care and "hi" to everyone.
Tattoo Jim

Gotta get one


He's proud of ragweed?


HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!!


And again.....


California Blues

1. 40% of all workers in L.A. County ( L.A. County has 10.2 million people) are working for cash and not paying taxes. This is because they are predominantly illegal immigrants working without a green card.

2. 95% of warrants for murder in Los Angeles are for illegal aliens.

3. 75% of people on the most wanted list in Los Angeles are illegal aliens.

4. Over 2/3 of all births in Los Angeles County are to illegal alien Mexicans on Medi-Cal, whose births were paid for by taxpayers.

5. Nearly 35% of all inmates in California detention centers are Mexican nationals here illegally

6. Over 300,000 illegal aliens in Los Angeles County are living in garages.

7. The FBI reports half of all gang members in Los Angeles are most likely illegal aliens from south of the border.

8. Nearly 60% of all occupants of HUD properties are illegal.

9. 21 radio stations in L. A. are Spanish speaking.

10. In L. A. County 5.1 million people speak English, 3.9 million speak Spanish. (There are 10.2 million people in L. A. County)
All 10 of the above are from the Los Angeles Times .

Less than 2% of illegal aliens are picking our crops, but 29% are on welfare. Over 70% of the United States annual population growth (and over 90% of California, Florida, and New York ) results from immigration. 29% of inmates in federal prisons are illegal aliens.

Rosie's camel toe


I'm really sorry about this......
-Yolo

Ban Doctors, Not Guns

(A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000.
(B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000.
(C) Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.
Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health Human Services.

Now think about this:
Guns:
(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000. (Yes , that's 80 million..)
(B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.
(C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .000188.
Statistics courtesy of FBI
So, statistically, doctors are approximately 9 ,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.
Remember, "Guns don't kill people, doctors do."
FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN, BUT ALMOST EVERYONE HAS AT LEAST ONE DOCTOR.

Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand!!!!!

Out of concern for the public at large, we have withheld the statistics on Lawyers for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Tattoo Jim!!!!!

Quit fucking around, man. Are you OK????

Man, what world did you grow up in?

PORT-OF-SPAIN, Trinidad – Defending his brand of world politics, President Barack Obama said Sunday that he "strengthens our hand" by reaching out to enemies of the United States and making sure that the nation is a leader, not a lecturer, of democracy.
Obama's foreign doctrine emerged across his four-day trip to Latin America, his first extended venture to a region of the world where resentment of U.S. power still lingers. He got a smile, handshakes and even a gift from incendiary leftist leader Hugo Chavez of Venezuela, and embraced overtures of new relations from isolated Cuban President Raul Castro.
"The whole notion was that if we showed courtesy or opened up dialogue with governments that had previously been hostile to us, that that somehow would be a sign of weakness," Obama said, recalling his race for the White House and challenging his critics today.
"The American people didn't buy it," Obama said. "And there's a good reason the American people didn't buy it — because it doesn't make sense."

Gotta Be California (again)


And I thought MY little Yellow School Bus was bad!


And drinks too!!!!


Mexico City earthquakes can be a bitch


Break into MY car?????


They saw me coming.....


I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!!!!


Somehow, I don't think she'll be missed

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, "Well, she's there."

Now that's just wrong....


Click to enlarge

TO-may-toe, TO-mah-to

I can't see the big deal with calling a Pakistani a Paki. It's just the same as calling an Australian an Aussie, a Scotsman a Scot or a Frenchman a pussy.

The traditional tombstone of Billy the Kid


Why, yes I am!


-Yolo

CANDYASS!!!!!


-Yolo

Einstien and his formula at work


Thanks, Ibeam

BA-K-47


We had our first annual Bacon Day this past Saturday. As a huge fan of bacon, and all the great bacon blogs out there, I decided it was time for me to make my own bacon creation. I came up with the BA-K-47, a 1:1 scale AK-47 made out of bacon. It took a total of eight hours to create, a lot of bacon, and a blowtorch... oh yeah, and our good friend beer helped too.
-www.thisisfreakingridiculous.com via Yolo