Saturday, October 30, 2010

NO!!!! say it ain't so, Obamessiah!!!!!!!

In the nightmare I found myself nude in bed, and I was looking at a mirror on the ceiling, and I discovered that I am a Negro, and I'm circumcised!
Quickly I jumped up, found my pants and looked in the pockets to find my driver license photo and it was that same color. Black.
I felt myself being very depressed, downcast, sitting in a chair.
But it's a wheelchair!!!
That means, of course, besides being black and Jewish, I'm also disabled!!!
I said to myself, aloud 'This is impossible. It's impossible that I should be black and Jewish and disabled.''It's the pure and holy truth', whispers someone from behind me I turn around, and it's my boyfriend. Just what I needed!!!
I am a homosexual, and on top of that with a Mexican boyfriend. Oh, my God..... Black, Jewish, disabled, gay, with a Mexican boyfriend, drug addict, and HIV-positive! !!
Desperate, I begin to shout, cry, pull my hair, and OH,noooooo...I' m Bald!!!
The telephone rings. It's my brother. He is saying, 'Since Mom and Dad died the only thing you do is hangout, take drugs, and laze around all day doing nothing. Get a job you worthless piece of crap... Any job.
Mom?... Dad?... Nooooooooo.. .Now I'm also an unemployed orphan!
I try to explain to my brother how hard it is to find a job when you are black, Jewish, disabled, gay with a Mexican boyfriend, are a drug addict, HIV-positive, bald, and an orphan.
But he doesn't get it.
Frustrated, I hang up. It's then I realize I only have one hand!!!
With tears in my eyes I go to the window to look out.
I see I live in a shanty-town full of cardboard and tin houses.
There's trash everywhere.
Suddenly I feel a sharp pain near my pacemaker....
Besides being black, Jewish, disabled, a fairy with a Mexican boyfriend, a drug addict, HIV- positive, bald, orphaned, unemployed, an invalid with one hand, and having a bad heart, I live in a crappy neighborhood.
At that very moment my boyfriend approaches and says to me, 'Sweetiepie,my love, my little black heartthrob, have you decided which inaugural party we are going to for Obama ?????
Say it isn't so!!!
I can handle being a black, disabled, one armed,drug addicted, Jewish queer on a Pacemaker who is HIV positive, bald,orphaned, unemployed, lives in a slum, and has a Mexican boyfriend ,but please, oh dear God, please don't tell me I'm a DEMOCRAT....


I'm so fucked up tonight it ain't funny.
I've been through 5 chapters on my new coyote book only to realize that I was reading Petersons' Field Guide. I started on coyotes and ended  up on sea lions. I thought it kinda sorta strange that them coyotes eat salmon and hang out in kelp.
With a little luck I can find and focus on a camel toe picture for Will and the boys before the night is out.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Mortgage payment? Yeah, right.....

I'm headed to the BassPro tomorrow. I need to get a couple of skinning knives. But...... I'm wanting an air rifle, a 22-250 set-up (dies, powder, primers and bullets), a winter camo coat, a squirrel call, any new coyote calls they may have, wool socks, a sinking 6 weight flyline, a winter camo rifle wrap, a binocular chest harness, winter shooting gloves and a fine pork loin from the Piggy Place (thanks Woody, that place fucking ROCKS!!!) on the way home.
It may be an expensive day here.......

Thursday, October 28, 2010

I'm not holding my breath.....

Ain't that the truth.....

And a great Friday to you, Boys.

For Vince


A sexually active woman tells her plastic surgeon that she wanted her vaginal lips reduced in size because they were too loose and floppy.
Out of embarrassment she insisted that the surgery be kept a secret and the surgeon agreed.
Awakening from the anesthesia after the surgery she found 3 roses carefully placed beside her on the bed.
Outraged, she immediately calls in the doctor. "I thought I asked you not to tell anyone about my operation!"
The surgeon told her he had carried out her wish for confidentiality and that the first rose was from him: "I felt sad because you went through this all by yourself."
"The second rose is from my nurse. She assisted me in the surgery and understood because she had had the same procedure done some time ago."
"And what about the third rose?" she asked.
"That's from a man upstairs in the burn unit. He wanted to thank you for his new ears."

Thanks, Bella.....

It's comin, folks.

Thanks, Bella

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Gotta be California (again)

Jeez..... even his fucking socks.

Texas A&M at it's finest

Somebody's excited!

Who knows?

I have no idea why, with his huge backyard, he needs to lay on the garden hose.

Uh-oh. I'm fucked.

He ain't real bright

CharlieGodammit is Norwegian Farm Dog (Buhund) and American Husky but his dominant traits are Buhund. By nature, he is a herding dog. Get 3 or 4 people in the backyard and he nips and pushes them into a group and then tries to keep them together.
In the house the only thing he has to herd is the 2 Evil Cats.
He has yet to see the futility of that exercise.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Drunk chicks - gotta love 'em

Isn't that the islam crescent moon on that shithouse door?

How appropriate.......

The Obamessiah on vacation

Straight Up White Trash, God Bless 'er

I've posted this before but damn, I do believe I'm in love.

She could crack my skull with those thighs

I'm not the only one.....

I'm not the only one that's ready for these fucking elections to be over.
My mailman has to have a hernia from lugging all those campaign ads around. I know, because he tells me about it every time he sees me.

I mean seriously, do these candidates honestly think I'm going to make my decisions on a glossy flyer? To be honest with you, I gotta wonder how that candidate is going to be spending my fucking tax dollars when they do get into office if they're spending their campaign bucks on mailers. And has one candidate come to or sent a representative to my door to personally ask me for my support?

Playing both ends against the middle

Looks to me like it's time to piss on the fire, call in the dogs and head for the Big House.
We've been played, pure and simple. Let them motherfuckers deal with their own problems with Irans' help.

TEHRAN, Iran – Iran acknowledged Tuesday it has been sending funds to neighboring Afghanistan for years, but said the money was intended to aid reconstruction, not to buy influence in the office of Afghan President Hamid Karzai.

Karzai said Monday he receives millions of dollars in cash from Iran, adding that Washington gives him "bags of money" too because his office lacks funds.
In Washington, President Barack Obama's press secretary, Robert Gibbs, denied that. "We're not in the big bags of cash business," he said Tuesday.
Earlier, State Department spokesman P.J. Crowley said some of the U.S. aid to Afghanistan is in cash.
U.S. officials asserted the money flowing from Tehran was proof that Iran is playing a double game in Afghanistan — wooing the government while helping Taliban insurgents fighting U.S. and NATO forces. Iran denies that.

Al Gore would be so proud.....

Oh, cool! They're turning on each other.

PROVIDENCE, R.I. -- President Barack Obama says it's "not a big deal" that Rhode Island Democratic candidate for governor Frank Caprio said he could "shove it" for not endorsing him.
Obama said during an interview with American Urban Radio Networks on Tuesday he understood Caprio was upset he hadn't endorsed him. But he said in politics you can't worry about what other people are saying about you "as long as you know you're focused on what's right for people."
Caprio told a radio station on Monday that Obama could "take his endorsement and really shove it" after learning the president wouldn't endorse anyone in the race.
Read more:

November 3rd

Well, hopefully by this time next week the regular folks will have a say in the way this country is being run. The Obamessiah will be on his way to India where he can worry about being hit by a missile and poisoned as well as wondering who he can bow down to.
We ought to declare it a National Holiday.

Hog heaven

I don't eat chocolate at all and damned little sugar. As a matter of fact there is no white sugar whatsoever in my house - can't remember the last time I bought some - and the only brown sugar I have is for making barbecue sauces and shit like that.
It's not that I'm a health nut, it's just that I don't have a sweet tooth. Chocolate runs right through me and sodas are so sickening sweet they almost gag me. I'll eat a slice of cake or pie on the holidays but that's just about it.
My special treats are avocados. I love them motherfuckers chunked into a bowl, covered in cottage cheese and lightly salted and peppered. At times, depending on the season, I just can't afford them especially when they're running 2 bucks apiece.
Today I was at the Savemart and saw a display of large avocados for that price. Then I walked around to the other side and there were Haas avocados at 2 for a dollar and I'll be damned if they weren't the same size!
So here I sit, burpin' and fartin', after finishing off a nice bowl of creamy avocados and cottage cheese. It almost makes up for the fucked up way my day started.

Only Bill Cosby

Could keep this going as long as he did.

Thanks to Skidmark for passing it along and brightening up my fucked up day.


Over the weekend I get a text from MY email address which I thought was funny seeing as I wasn't anywhere near a computer at the time and hadn't been all morning. When I open it I see just a link.
When I get home I have a dozen or so emails from friends wanting to know why I'm sending them links to Canadian drugs, namely viagra. What the hell?
I checked my sent folder and there's nothing there. Then I look in my inbox and bigger than shit, there's a message that I sent myself. I open it, see that it was also sent to everybody in my address book and it's just a link.
This isn't cool. I contact Norton Antivirus and they tell me that it's a Trojan Horse that somehow got in and they's already patched it. they advise me to run a scan, find it and eliminate it.
A quick scan turns up nothing. A full scan shows 1 "threat" so I sic Norton on it and kill it. End of problem.
Yeah right. Last night I got another text from me around midnight and I had been in bed since 9.
I got up, woke the computer up and then shut it down, hoping that would do some good until I could get in from work today.
So I got ready for work this morning, jumped in the truck and got 5 feet down the road before realizing I had a flat right front tire. FUCK!!!!
I crawled under the rear of the bed to drop my spare, punched it and saw that it was flat too. I started to fire up the compressor to air it up and thought "Fuck it. I'll get it changed, get halfway to work and it'll go flat again." So I pulled out my cell, called in broke down and went back into the house.
I drank another cup of coffee and checked my email. Yolo had written asking that that I take her out of my address book until I got the problem resolved. Yeah, that's a good idea. Not only did I remove her but after copying my contacts to a .doc, I eliminated my entire address book.
Another full scan showed nothing that needed my attention, yet I did get a text last night.
So today after I get my tire repaired/replaced, I'm going to try and figure this shit out. The thing is, I haven't installed any new programs, opened any weird emails, nor visited any new sites except a couple of blogs and a new coyote hunting forum, but those were supposedly scanned by Norton and I got no warnings that they may be unsafe.
Not a good start to my work week......

Monday, October 25, 2010

Becks' fly-over

Glenn Beck had been trying for weeks to get a military fly-over with fighter jets for the start of the Restoring Honor event, but the White House blocked it saying it was "restricted airspace." The rally started at 10:00 am, but at precisely 9:59am, God gave them His “fly-over” – a sight that could not have been better!


Awww, did his feelings get hurt???

PROVIDENCE, R.I. – The Democratic candidate for Rhode Island governor, widely seen as more conservative than the independent seeking to lead the heavily Democratic state, said Monday that President Barack Obama can "shove it" after learning Obama would not endorse him.
Frank Caprio's campaign said last week that he would welcome the president's endorsement. But on Monday, the same day Obama made his first visit to Rhode Island as president and a day after the White House said Obama would endorse no one, Caprio angrily told WPRO-AM that Obama can "take his endorsement and really shove it."

Talking smack

Sometimes it pays to just maintain a humble demeanor and suffer the minor injustices of life.
But then, where would we be without experience?

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Oh, HELL yeah!!!!!

I still think it's cooler than shit that my weekend visits fall way off and the most hits that I get, by far, are during work hours - not lunch or break times - but when you folks should be crunching them numbers.
You fuckers ROCK!!!!!!!

No dummies in that village

Thanks, Woody.

You guys are right! This shit IS fun!!!!

Image is everything in your job, Barry.

You know what has been increasingly pissing me off about the Obamessiah? Seriously?
Him and Lady Obamas' casual look - especially his. Him doing public appearances with an open collar and shirt sleeves rolled up like he is one of us.
You know what, motherfucker? You aren't one of us and you will never, ever rise up to my level. You haven't done a days' manual labor in your adult life. You have never hoped that your paycheck will beat the electric bill cut-off notice to the house. You've never done without so your kids or elderly parents will have what they need.
So quit acting like you're one of the common folk. You're not fooling anybody.
You're the leader of the most powerful nation on earth. Act like it and dress the part.

Why bother to vote?

Stolen from Flopping Aces

I am... I am... I am...

Chickenshit asshole

What a chickenshit motherfucker. I'm just wondering how much this trip is gonna cost me and you. If he's all that worried that somebody's gonna X him out, why doesn't he stay home and invite whoever he wants to visit to the White House? Does it really matter where he bows down to the motherfucker?
And in the last paragraph, he's worried that somebody will spike his food. With what, pork?

The Economic Times reports, the Obamas will stay at the Taj Mahal Hotel, and his itinerary practically means Marine Drive will be shut for vehicular traffic on the day of the President’s visit, while buildings flanking it will be sanitised with security personnel manning them until Obama has left the place. Same would be the case with Obama’s visit to Mani Bhawan and Michelle going to Kamathipura.
An officer with the security establishment said, “Several other arterial roads in south Mumbai will also see restricted traffic movement, with tight security all around. The Obamas are not expected to schedule any engagements in the night due to security reasons.”
Since Obama is expected to arrive in the afternoon on November 6, and will travel by road to the Taj Mahal Hotel, the entire stretch from airport to the hotel will be under heavy security. The officer said, “There will be no vehicular movement on Western Express Highway at that time. Traffic on roads leading up to the highway will also be stopped. All buildings flanking the entire stretch will be sanitised. However, there is no threat from the snipers as the President will travel in a bullet-proof car with 4.5-inch thick sheets, which are impenetrable for any gun.”
Obama’s personal security staff itself will be huge, and it has already started making its own arrangements in Mumbai. “A team of secret service agents has already arrived, and has surveyed the areas of his stay and the roads and places on his itinerary,” the officer said.
To ensure fool-proof security, the President’s team has booked the entire Taj Mahal Hotel, including 570 rooms, all banquets and restaurants. Since his security contingent and staff will comprise a huge number, 125 rooms at Taj President have also been booked, apart from 80 to 90 rooms each in Grand Hyatt and The Oberoi hotels. The NCPA, where the President is expected to meet representatives from the business community, has also been entirely booked.
The officer said, “Obama’s contingent is huge. There are two jumbo jets coming along with Air Force One, which will be flanked by security jets. There will be 30 to 40 secret service agents, who will arrive before him. The President’s convoy has 45 cars, including the Lincoln Continental in which the President travels.”
Since Obama will stay in a hotel that is on sea front, elaborate coastal security arrangements have been made by the US Navy in consonance with the Indian Navy and the Coast Guard. “There will be US naval ships, along with Indian vessels, patrolling the sea till about 330-km from the shore. This is to negate the possibility of a missile being fired from a distance,” the officer said.
The President will be accompanied by his chefs, not because he would not like to savour Indian cuisine, but to ensure his food is not spiked.

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